There is probably no "right" way to do this anyway. I told everybody at work since I needed to ask for accomodations. Our "grape vine" is pretty amazing so I decided I would control the flow of information as best I could by being honest and open. I think they now wish I would shut up, lol!
The down side to this is that once I told a lot of folks, I decided it was only fair to tell my family. I wish I did not frighten them until I have an actual DX but who knew it would take this long?
There is no perfect solution. We just do the best we can!