Old 07-31-2014, 11:30 PM #1 (permalink)
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Default Divorced, Fatigued, and Working Full-Time

Hi Everyone, I am new to this forum. I'm looking for friends that are facing the same challenges I currently am. I could really use some emotional support & encouragement. I have fibromyalgia which, of course, has been flaring up on & off due to the breakup of my 14 year marriage to my best friend So, I have found myself single again... but now at age 43, stressed out knowing I've got to continue to work hard no matter how I feel, and praying for more energy and less restless leg syndrome.

Here's my fibro symptoms...pain in bilateral knees, ankles, feet, hands, hips & neck. My biggest challenge has been the overwhelming fatigue regardless of having 8-9 hrs of sleep per night.

Meds...Cymbalta, Lyrica, Tramadol...Xanax for my anxiety

I would appreciate suggestions or just to know I'm not alone.
Thanks for your time!
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Old 08-01-2014, 12:06 AM #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: Divorced, Fatigued, and Working Full-Time

Not alone. You'll find lots of fellow travelers on this board. Not everyone is in your exact situation, but all of us are struggling with this disease.

My own story: divorced after 18 years, stay-at-home parent. Now back in the work force, single parent, working full-time with fibro/cfs, making poverty wages, no child support. I drag myself through every day then get up the next day and do the same. Honestly, every day I don't know how I get through it, but I do. The brave spirit in me says I will keep pushing through all the tomorrows like I pushed through today. The practical side of me may have to succumb some day to the reality that I am disabled, and that I may not always be able to push through an endless succession of tomorrows. For the moment, though, my plan is to keep working and keep pushing and keep hoping that maybe something will change, some new treatment, some new drug, some new something that makes it possible for me to keep working.

My strategy for coping is to let go a lot and to find pleasure in every possible thing. I try to let go of expectations of myself, like I "should" have the laundry done, "should" cook something other than TV dinner tonight, "should" volunteer for the kid's school's bake sale, etc. On good days, I try to make some extra meals to freeze or get caught up on the basic housework, but on bad days, I redefine success as things like, "I managed to take a shower today," or "I put in 8 hours at work" or even on really bad days, "It's bed time, and I've successfully stayed alive another day."

As for finding pleasure everywhere, I savor every smell, every taste, every sound, every smile. On days I can't get out of bed, I allow myself the luxury of really feeling just how perfect my mattress is, not too firm, not too soft. I enjoy the smell of summer coming in from the open window. I appreciate the kindness of when my child brings me milk and cookies in bed and is content to snuggle next to me and read or watch a movie together. Then of course, on good days, there's the whole joy of getting to do things that had been taken away on the bad days, things like walking around the block, or standing long enough to fix a tasty meal instead of a frozen pizza.

You're not alone. Hang in there.
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Old 08-01-2014, 08:18 PM #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: Divorced, Fatigued, and Working Full-Time

You are not alone at all! We are all going through so many challenges and I really feel for you. I have been single and working for 20+ years and it has been an uphill battle almost the entire time. I have other chronic conditions too, but if you don't take some time for yourself and keep from stressing out, your Fibromyalgia will get much worse. I have had an oral thrush infection for over 6 months now and the 6 doctors that I have been too tell me that my immune system is being weakened by all of the stress that I am under on a daily basis. I know there are no easy answers, but if you can cut back the hours on your job a little bit and take even a few minutes out of your day for yourself, it might help you.

I have started doing meditation and taking long, bubble baths while I listen to my music, I also have one square of chocolate every day, it does seem to help me in dealing with all of the daily activities that seem to stress me out. Also make sure that you are getting enough sleep so that your body can recover from the day, that is number one for me!

I am very lucky in one respect, I have a wonderful son who cooks for me every night and who also gives me a back rub when I'm really hurting. I wish that I could go to a massage Therapist but I don't have any money to do that right at the moment. Someday when I do, I am going to start doing that. I am pretty sure it will help me out tremendously. Hang in there, we are all with you!
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Old 08-01-2014, 09:20 PM #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: Divorced, Fatigued, and Working Full-Time

You are not alone, There are so many wonderful people on here that will listen and support you. You can ask us anything we are here for you even if you just need to vent. I am so thankful I found this Forum.
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Old 08-02-2014, 06:37 PM #5 (permalink)
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Default Re: Divorced, Fatigued, and Working Full-Time

You are not alone. I am 30 and my pain and fatigue is horrible. My dr just took me off work for 3 weeks. I can't imagine going back. They don't understand even showering everyday is hard work. Everyday day tasks are so difficult. Working 40-60 hours in a physical job is near impossible People are so shocked I'm off work no one believed my back etc was that bad they are soo shocked cause I always put in a beavers face.
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