Day 36

Well here I go again talking about my mother. Sorry if this topic is not what you expected, but for me this blog clears my mind of the scary thoughts and hardships of life while I care for her each day.

Yesterday, I had the biggest scare of my life when she got upset about a minor thing and completely shut down her brain, by going inside herself. I thought at first she was just sleeping but she would not wake up or open her eyes. Then the thought of a TIA, came to me, but that proved to be false. She had said to me nothing matters anymore and I am going away now.

I pleaded with her for a longtime to just open her eyes and say something, so then she kept saying 'something'over and over. She remained asleep and at one point I said open your eyes or I am calling 911. Then she sort of chuckled and said 'No' to that idea. By the time she came back to me I was totally wore out from the emotional strain and needed to rest my weary brain.

I got her up out of her chair and into the wheelchair, and off to bed. She slept for two hours and woke up to being her old cheerful self. I was so relieved. And for those of you wondering, yes I called the visiting nurses for help, but none could come. An ER visit would have only made matters worse as it was because she was mad at me that she went away in her mind, and the hospital stays frighten her.

I have since been informed that this is common in some dementia patients. But it is so scary when it happens and to think that someone in that condition can at will drift away is frightening. Now of course her brain is failing and she is failing and I am not ready for that stage yet. So I am heartbroken and trying to adjust to this new reality that someday soon she may be totally bed-ridden and then the hardest part of all which is when she no longer knows us.

We who are a bit younger than she, at 87, see our lives wreaked by fibro, and yet we in a way can also see a value and hope of brighter days ahead.
I hope that there are a few brighter days ahead for all of us and for my mom.

Thanks for your time and your support! :-(

Comments

Hello,
I went through all the steps of dementia, broken hip, heart problems. It's tough,hang on to the good days, take pictures.
Maybe a word to the wise, try to avoid saying.....yes we did that, 'Don't you remember'? It's already frustrating for them to remember, and when they are asked' don't u remember'? It just exasperate the situation. Good luck. My prayers are with you
God Blesses Messes

I am sorry this is happening to you and to your Mom. You are a good person =D Sadly I have lost touch with my last living Grandmother. I remember somewhere about her having problems too. Sadly I have not seen her in years. We never really had a connection but I do have a few good memories when I was a kid. So as long as you hold onto the good times it will be okay.

Thank you both for your words of encouragement and prayers. Each day gets harder with new things cropping up, but I am doing my best to care for her. It is discouraging at times and sad but glad I am here for her. Thanks again!

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