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Nexi

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Dec 1, 2015
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90
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DX FIBRO
Diagnosis
03/2002
Country
CA
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Northwest Territories
You know...I have been dealing with Fibromyalgia, Chronic Fatigue, IBD, Interstitial Cystitis, Cluster Headaches and Lupus and yet it amazes me how quickly the depression can consume me more than everything else!

Today, I just can't see anything positive about living. Not that I am suicidal....I just feel completely deflated. I have been trying to snap myself out of this because logically I know there is so much joy in life. And yet here I sit...
 

Forgetmenot

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Joined
Oct 6, 2014
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1,529
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Diagnosis
70/2010
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UK
State
Hertfordshire
Crap isn't it. When u hurt every day of your life then it's not to much of a leap to understand why your feeling down.
We have 24 hour pain everyday of our life's ,no one can have this and not get really down xx
 

diamond

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DX FIBRO
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01/2008
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UK
State
anywhere
I second that...we keep going but its hard and is bound to hit you full on some days.x
 

TipBill

Senior member
Joined
Sep 8, 2014
Messages
224
Reason
DX FIBRO
Diagnosis
03/2014
Country
US
State
None
I can completely relate to what you are saying. Depression consumes every waking moment of my life on a daily basis. I guess that's why I sleep so much. When I sleep the depression goes away and for the most part I have pleasant dreams where I am out enjoying life. The weather we are having here doesn't help much. It is cold, about 2 degrees with a wind chill of -25. Can't wait for spring. Take care and try to feel better.
 

Cindykay

Active member
Joined
Apr 10, 2015
Messages
39
Reason
DX FIBRO
Diagnosis
01/2015
Country
US
State
OH
I agree with you all - sometimes it just doesn't seem worth it to keep on plugging. Does anyone else feel guilty about their illness and depression? I know there are people (some of you!) who are dealing with worse problems than I, and that my family is pretty patient and understanding, and I am fortunate to have financial resources so I don't have to work full time - and I feel so guilty about it all! I "should" be there more for my aging mom, my boyfriend "deserves a better mate", I " should" be able to do more. Argh.
 

Chexmix

Active member
Joined
Mar 3, 2015
Messages
48
Reason
DX FIBRO
Diagnosis
07/2014
Country
US
State
Ne
Well you are touching others with your words! I think that's something. Winter can make things even tougher on our bodies. Have your vitamin D levels been evaluated? I know someone else mentioned their provider wanted them to hit tanning beds to increase D levels. I haven't tried that yet but do supplement D3 on a regular basis. I hope u get your groove back soon! It can be so hard to see joy thru the pain. We get it!!
 

Nexi

Active member
Joined
Dec 1, 2015
Messages
90
Reason
DX FIBRO
Diagnosis
03/2002
Country
CA
State
Northwest Territories
Thanks so much... You all know exactly what I needed to hear. Dr called to tell me my vit D level is the lowest she has seen with me. So, good call Chexmix. It also is very difficult living in the Arctic. Right now we have no sun...all dark, all day and night.

Yes, Chexmix, I feel guilty all the time too. I just try to keep a stiff upper lip and hold it together. I mean it is the least I can do when most my days I am doing all I can just to type. I too am in the same situation as you Chexmix in that I am blessed with a wonderful support group here and I don't have to be concerned with working. So why am I depressed? Because I have a boo boo?!?!?! There are some bloody amazing individuals on this forum that have what I have, that feel what I feel and yet they are going it alone,having to work, having to raise children on their own. So what right do I have to be depressed?!?! None! I applaud all of you out there doing it alone...you guys/gals are my heroes.
Thanks so much for your kind words of encouragement...Willow,Chexmix,Cindykay, Forgetmenot,and Krista. It was exactly what I needed. XOXO
 

diamond

Legendary member
Joined
Sep 18, 2015
Messages
1,548
Reason
DX FIBRO
Diagnosis
01/2008
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UK
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anywhere
you have every right because its tough so tough and pain non stop is draining and not being able to do things is beyond frustrating...watching the world carry on without you...take care to you Nexi and all the brave peeps on here x
 

DK_engineer

Very helpful member
Joined
Jun 20, 2015
Messages
579
Reason
DX FIBRO
Diagnosis
05/2015
Country
US
State
OR
I agree with Willow... Every one has a right to feel emotions, even the negative ones. The experience of unending pain would make make anyone feel profoundly sad, anxious and / or angry. If you have depression or anxiety on top of those feelings, it all becomes that much more difficult.

When I feel discouraged I try to focus on something I can accomplish even if it is very smal (like walking to the end of the block and back or chopping lettuce for a salad). I give myself an imaginary gold star for finishing the task (or on some days just for attempting it). It may sound kind of silly, but it really does help me get through this.
 

Nexi

Active member
Joined
Dec 1, 2015
Messages
90
Reason
DX FIBRO
Diagnosis
03/2002
Country
CA
State
Northwest Territories
You guys are one hundred percent right. I have been in a very bad place lately and usually encouraging others helps to pull me out but this time it was just to low of a low.

My pain has been through the roof. My longtime doctor had my husband pick up some demerol shots because I had not slept in two weeks. When I say that I mean I don't sleep more than 2 hours a night and typically I cannot sleep during the day as the pain is too much. Last night I had continual demerol shots...my hubby would set the alarm clock and follow the doctors instructions, I hardly remember him doing it. I just got up at 4 pm. My husband had stayed home and made sure that I was not disturbed and he is repeating that again tonight. Already I am feeling remarkably better...hopefully this will help me get a control over the pain again.
 

diamond

Legendary member
Joined
Sep 18, 2015
Messages
1,548
Reason
DX FIBRO
Diagnosis
01/2008
Country
UK
State
anywhere
Glad it's helping Nexi.
 

remnant

Senior member
Joined
Mar 11, 2016
Messages
209
Reason
Other
Diagnosis
00/0000
Country
KYA
State
Central
Both depression and anxiety are normal occurrences in life. These two conditions are normally diagnosed alongside fibromyalgia symptoms. It is encouraging that you are able to disengage yourself and monitor your feelings. A chronic sadness and depression that lasts for more than 2 weeks is what is unacceptable. In addition it has the ability to make you lose or gain weight. I would encourage you to be active in confronting your negative thought patterns and concentrate in areas in your life where you register success. Find new activities that you enjoy.
 
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