Status
Not open for further replies.

Diamondgirl

New member
Joined
Dec 23, 2013
Messages
6
Diagnosis
09/2009
Country
US
State
NM
I am new to this forum and to sharing about this illness. I was diagnosed in 2009, but refused to acknowledge that I have fibromyalgia until about 2 months ago. I never told anyone I had it and I convinced myself I didn't. Every time I feel good, I think that I am going to feel good forever. I guess I reason that as quickly as it came on, it is just as quickly moving away from me. I confess that I convince myself that I am well, am done with this crap. I confess that I have denied this illness for 5 years. I have so much hope and desire for this to all be gone, that I actually believe that one day it will be. I don't want to give up on that hope. My confession is that I am living with fibromyalgia. I confess that despite knowing for 5 years I still can't believe that it is true though I suffer just about daily. I am shocked to be living this life, yet I do it everyday. HOPE, I confess that I have an abundant amount of hope and it keeps me going. Silly Me. Wonderful Me. Hopeful Me. Sad Me. I confess that I love me and I will never give up hope. I confess to sometimes feeling desperate and that does not look good on me.
 

shattered

Member
Joined
Dec 20, 2013
Messages
19
Diagnosis
05/2011
Country
US
State
TX
Hi, Diamondgirl. I know this kind of denial all too well. I was hoping to ignore it to the point where it would just go away. I changed my diet to a very healthy one, and am sure to say my prayers and meditations daily, but, it hasn't cured me. I also had hoped it was an extreme form of menopause and that it would go away with the onset. But, it just keeps getting worse, and every year one more ailment seems to be added to a growing list of problems associated with this malady. So, I am now at a point where I am ready to accept, however begrudgingly. I wonder if this is some sort of test? Or if the chronic stress we all face in life has finally taken it's toll? Anyway, welcome, and hello.
 

Whyfor

Active member
Joined
Dec 20, 2013
Messages
39
Diagnosis
00/0000
Country
US
State
CA
It sounds like you had to come to face the very same, hard reality that I did just the other day: we have a disease, a disease that is not very well understood, may very well be openly mocked by the misinformed, and harbors very few obviously visible signals that we can show our loved when we're suffering. Fibromyalgia is a mean little condition - it makes us feel like we're crazy or hypochondriacs in a world that only values what you can see on the outside. We may struggle for a diagnosis, and battle with our closest friends and family just to explain that we really, truly are struggling. Every step is a fight just to get through the day.

But you're not alone! You don't have to fight it alone. And that's one of the most valuable darn things of all in this life.
 

Trellum

Legendary member
Joined
Jul 17, 2013
Messages
1,788
Reason
DX FIBRO
Diagnosis
04/2011
Country
NL
State
NL
Diamondgirl, you are not alone at all. I actually had a hard time accepting my own diagnosis, I didn't quite accept mine until some months ago. At times I feel really scared, but that hope you were talking about is the only thing that keeps me going; the hope I'll be better one day. I think this kind of hopeful thought is almost universal :) Some days are very hard others not so much, today was a hard one, tomorrow it will be a better day :) Let's keep on hoping!

Did you know that positive thinking can help enourmously? That's why I'm trying to be as positive as possible. G-d knows there are some days this is almost impossible. What I do during those days is to simply go to bed. I usually wake up feeling much better the next day :) Rest assured you are not alone :)
 

Corvid

Distinguished member
Joined
Dec 21, 2013
Messages
101
Diagnosis
06/2012
Country
US
State
**
Losing the active, healthy bodies we had before and losing the ability to do all those things we used to do is a kind of death. We need to give ourselves permission to grieve our losses just as we would the loss of a loved one. Denial (followed by or along with bargaining, anger, depression, and finally, acceptance) is the first stage in the grief process. The key is to keep moving forward through the grieving process, and to allow trustworthy others to help us when we are overwhelmed or stuck along the way.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Top