Status
Not open for further replies.

links56

Distinguished member
Joined
Oct 29, 2013
Messages
177
Reason
DX FIBRO
Diagnosis
01/2013
Country
US
State
IL
Hello, I'm a 25 year old male that has been diagnosed with fibromyagia and chronic fatigue syndrome. Im sure I've had this longer than I have been diagnosed with it. I don't know how else to say it, fibromyalgia has torn my life apart. My life hasn't been the best anyway, my mother passed when I was 6 from lung cancer and the remainder of my childhood was filled with physical and mental abuse. Depression has came and left many times in my life, it's just gotten so bad this time.I'm just in so much pain, it's like dulled everything out. My girlfriend left me awhile back after a couple years of dating, she got sick of the mood swings and not being ready to go out all night after working all day. Plus side effects of different medications. Everyone thinks you're faking it, no one at work understands or cares. I've just gotten to a point where I just don't care a whole lot about anything anymore, I can't handle people anymore, I'm missing work, I'm so exhausted all the time. I apologize for rambling on so much, I'm just really overwhelmed. Oh and I'm not wanting to hurt myself or anything like that. I've been trying to fight all this stuff and in just burned out. Thanks for reading, any advice will be greatly appreciated.
 

Trfielder

Active member
Joined
Oct 2, 2013
Messages
99
Diagnosis
07/2013
Country
CA
State
Ontario
I'm sorry you are in the "fibro funk" as I call it...I think it really is a symptom of fibro. There are men on this forum look to old postings to see what they have to say..I'm sure it is different for men then it is for women but still the same... We are in this together. You are not alone . Try to find one positive in your life and focus on it...you will be amazed how one little thing can change your whole outlook ...
 

willowbee221

New member
Joined
Oct 30, 2013
Messages
7
Diagnosis
02/2013
Country
US
State
FL
First of all, take a deep breath. It really does help. Then, just slow down. It sounds cliche to say "take it one day at a time", but you'd be surprised. Over the years, I have learned that if I take it one thing (not even one day, just one little thing), I don't feel so overwhelmed. Sadly, there isn't a lot we can do to stop Fibro. But we can learn to cope with it while still leading a happy, fulfilled life. Don't make yourself feel guilty because you aren't able to do certain things (like go out after work). Know your limitations and don't exceed them, unless absolutely necessary. Talk to your body, ask yourself - "Do I really feel like doing this or that? Is it necessary that I do it today? Will it make a difference if I don't do it?" If the answer is no, then don't do it! Stay positive and do at least one thing everyday that makes YOU happy.
 

links56

Distinguished member
Joined
Oct 29, 2013
Messages
177
Reason
DX FIBRO
Diagnosis
01/2013
Country
US
State
IL
Thanks, I'm trying to slow down, Its just my whole life I've worked very hard and had so much stuff going on at once and now I'm reduced to snail speed and can barely get through the day. The pain is terrible it just makes you numb to the world, unfortunately I'm unfamiliar of what kinds of doctors I should be seeking out and for what. my family doctor figured it out and I went to a rheumatologist to get it diagnosed, and my family doctor treats me. I'm just not sure if shes adequately trained to treat it. I trust her but I feel my depression is caused because the pain and because the pain I struggle to get anything done which depresses me, she won't give me anything for the pain because she doesn't want me to get dependent on it. I don't want that either but there has got to be something to help with this constant energy draining pain.
 

Trfielder

Active member
Joined
Oct 2, 2013
Messages
99
Diagnosis
07/2013
Country
CA
State
Ontario
There are meds for pain ..I had tried Gabapentin, Lyrica and cymbalta.im sure ther are others that are not opioids ! Search around this site and do some research take what you find back to your DR . Try to work with her on this. There are also natural ways to help with pain..hot baths pain relief creams ,altering your diet ,marijuana ...there are so many things to help you cope..which will help the depression or anti depression meds if needed. You do not have to suffer day in and day out. I don't thinks its fair that your Dr isn't trying to help more. So get as much info together as you can and go back to her..maybe she doesn't know..help her learn that will be the best for you both.
 

ecletic1

Member
Joined
Jun 12, 2013
Messages
12
Diagnosis
04/2009
Country
us
State
colorado
hi
you need to take something to lessen the pain. I see a doctor that specializes in pain control, he's very compassionate and stays current on treatment alternatives.
have been on hydrocodone , lyrica, neurontin and tramadol.
started a new med called nucynta and it's pretty effective for me.
not widely prescribed since it's expensive-had to get special approval from my insurance.
 

1sweed

Moderator
Joined
Feb 4, 2013
Messages
1,956
Reason
DX FIBRO
Diagnosis
01/1995
Country
US
State
Pennsylvania
You mentioned the problem of dealing with depression. I have to admit there have been times in my own life when the pain and sadness over the loss of my body strength and ability to work made me feel worthless. But I managed to improve my self-esteem by going to see a mental health counseler and by starting some new hobbies to take my mind off the pain. Sometimes getting a pet can be a cheerful event and a turning point. Some like cats or dogs, cage birds or even a fish tank. Hobbies that are easy to do are stamp collecting or working jigsaw or crossword puzzles, or painting or other craft work that does not take much hand or arm strength.

I was able to walk some so I took walks in the woods and in my local park. I visited elderly people in my neighborhood and in the nursing home, to give them someone to talk with and to cheer them up, thus taking the focus off me and off my pain. I read books and listened to books on tape, when my hands were to weak to hold a book. Most libraries have books on tape or video, to listen too.

If you have a yard at your home or apartment put up a bird feeder and enjoy the visits of wildbirds. All these things can be tried in order to chase depression away. It seems easier to just shut out the world and sleep all day, but in the long run you must fight against locking yourself away and force yourself to do new things and go outside or watch things outside your windows.

I hope this helps give you ideas on improving your mental state and your well-being. :)
 

Kiwifruit

New member
Joined
Nov 9, 2013
Messages
7
Diagnosis
11/2013
Country
NZ
State
Manawatu-Wanganui Region
Losing your mother at such a young age is extremely traumatic. You miss out on so much of your childhood without a mother. I would recommend seeing a grief counsellor about that. Even though it happened almost 20 years ago, you don't mentally process these things until you reach adulthood so you'd only be dealing with the loss now.
My mother left us just before I started high school. I missed out on so many things like having a mother who proudly takes a photo before my school ball, having someone to talk to about emotional things and problems. I dealt with it without thinking about it much, but when I got to mid-20s it just really hit me how many positive memories I'd missed out on. Your case is much worse because you were so young when you lost her and missed out on more.
Many people find that counselling relieves their physical symptoms. I really hope you'll consider it.
Are you taking medication like amitripytaline? Its technically a tricylic anti-depressant but its frequently prescribed for fibro pain, migraines and insomnia. It cheers you up a bit.
 

Siderea

Senior member
Joined
Oct 22, 2013
Messages
231
Diagnosis
10/2013
Country
USA
State
ND
I'm sorry you're suffering so much. You're coping with a lot of loss and stress, and that kind of mental agony can make pain even worse.

I tried Cymbalta, an anti-depressant, and found it made my depression much much worse. It also made me emotionally, spiritually, and physically numb. I just stopped caring about everything and had no motivation for anything. Within two days of getting off it I felt a surge of emotions coming back, and I cried a lot, but the crying helped so much to relieve all the tension I wasn't feeling while on Cymbalta. I've talked to several other people around town and online who have all had very negative experiences with Cymbalta too. Another person I talked to doesn't think she has any negative side effects from it, but her back pain has been much worse since taking it and her sleep patterns are very funky. Personally, I don't recommend trying any anti-depressants unless as an absolute last resort. The risk of making things worse is very high.

That said, I do understand the "fibro funk" very well without being on meds. Depression comes easily for me now. I have had some major trauma in my life too, though not on par with losing a parent. Trauma keeps coming back to haunt us until we seek help for it. I used to work for a mental health clinic, and my boss, a psychologist, did some hypnotism for me. It did help a lot, and what's great is that I have a recording of his hypnosis on CD that I can listen to when I need help coping. Mental health counseling has homework, and if you don't do the work you won't get results. So if you can find the willpower to do some work, I highly recommend finding a psychologist. At the very least, a psychologist will give you tools you can pull out when you're suffering.

Personally, I've learned to "force" enjoyment of things. I may not feel like doing something I normally enjoy, but after forcing myself to get started I tend to "wake up" a bit and enjoy it. I've found that video games have been by far the most helpful. They're very gentle on the body, but really gets the mind working. I feel a sense of accomplishment playing them, feeling like I'm able to do something significant and make progress in some form. Giving your mind that type of feeling, even if you're only accomplishing something in a video game, can really boost your mood and give you something to feel proud of. That can transfer to real life too. My favorite games are offline role playing games, because they require the most mental investment and offer the most satisfaction. Simple games like Pokemon are really good too, because it's constant work in a positive direction.

Walking around the block, despite the pain, helps a lot too. I might make the pain worse for a little while, but it gives my mind a break from the house. Grocery shopping for healthy foods, not snack foods that fuel depression, helps too. When the only food in my kitchen is organic veggies, meats, beans, and fruits then I'm forced to eat those things. And I do feel a lot better, because my body is getting the kind of nutrition it actually requires. Also, taking vitamin d3 and omega-3's daily helps a lot. I take the Nordic Naturals Omega-D3 3-4 times a day. It has no fish taste, but I actually notice the effect of it, unlike other lower quality fish pills. Your brain and nervous system require these nutrients to function properly, and they're hard to get enough of without taking supplements.

Also, acupuncture hasn't been helping substantially with my fibro pain (it has helped some,) but it's helped significantly with my sleep and mood. It's helped so much, in fact, that I can go from feeling down to feeling very very positive and happy after I leave. Chiropractic care helps the most with my pain management, and just being aligned has helped my mood too. Acupuncture and chiropractic care require a lot of visits, but honestly, it's the most effective money I've spent all year.

Hope I've given you some helpful ideas!
 

Trellum

Legendary member
Joined
Jul 17, 2013
Messages
1,788
Reason
DX FIBRO
Diagnosis
04/2011
Country
NL
State
NL
Hello, I'm a 25 year old male that has been diagnosed with fibromyagia and chronic fatigue syndrome. Im sure I've had this longer than I have been diagnosed with it. I don't know how else to say it, fibromyalgia has torn my life apart. My life hasn't been the best anyway, my mother passed when I was 6 from lung cancer and the remainder of my childhood was filled with physical and mental abuse. Depression has came and left many times in my life, it's just gotten so bad this time.I'm just in so much pain, it's like dulled everything out. My girlfriend left me awhile back after a couple years of dating, she got sick of the mood swings and not being ready to go out all night after working all day. Plus side effects of different medications. Everyone thinks you're faking it, no one at work understands or cares. I've just gotten to a point where I just don't care a whole lot about anything anymore, I can't handle people anymore, I'm missing work, I'm so exhausted all the time. I apologize for rambling on so much, I'm just really overwhelmed. Oh and I'm not wanting to hurt myself or anything like that. I've been trying to fight all this stuff and in just burned out. Thanks for reading, any advice will be greatly appreciated.

Sorry to hear you are going tru this. I also lost my job some years ago, and that's why I work online now. It can be so convenient... Just like you I also suffer from depression, this seems to be a common factor among people like us. I wonder if it could be linked to the cause we have this, or it's just a result of living and feeling the way we do.

I completely relate to your post, I'm just 26 after all. I'm a female... and my boyfriend doesn't understand what I'm going tru, and to be fair I don't think he's forced to. I mean... how could he ever do that? Unless he got the same I do, sadly fibro isn't my only problem... plus my fibro isn't all that bad. I've suffered from paralizing pain episodes (legs and hips), but not often thankfully.

Sadly the people who are going tru this will never get it, and that's something you will have to learn to deal with. Don't worry, the adjustment can be really slow, so don't feel bad about this... just try to look straight to the future and think you're going tru this so you can finally adjust and find this easier to deal with. That's what I do and it works to calm me down.
 

Jettbear

Member
Joined
Nov 6, 2013
Messages
13
Diagnosis
03/1988
Country
US
State
NY
So sorry you are having such a difficult time. I have been living with fibro for many years and during that time suffered from depression like most of us. I have been seeing a therapist since I got diagnosed, been on meds for depression and sometimes they needed to be changed. Been to several chiropractors and did acupuncture which have both helped but can be costly. I saw a Rheumy for over 15 years who helped with giving me pain meds and Soma.Now that he is retired and I live in NY state, no more pain meds. Recently he retired and I have been sent to pain management which after seeing the dr. on Friday I am not going down that road. She wanted an MRI of my spine and sent me to PT, which I did 8 months out of the year when I was first diagnosed. Anyway point is this isn't an easy diagnosis to live with but it is possible to find some relief through multiple modalities which can work together. Meds, psychotherapy, PT, water exercises when you can get out of bed. They help but will not take fibro away. I feel for you since you are so young. Just connecting with people who understand is half the battle. Good luck to you and keep on posting when you feel up to it, someone is always there to listen.
 

WillowPaws

New member
Joined
Nov 24, 2013
Messages
8
Diagnosis
10/2013
Country
US
State
Oregon
Sorry you're feeling so crappy.
I feel a bit like I can relate ~~ I'm a survivor of abuse, and before I had fibro I struggled a lot with depression. I've just recently been diagnosed, and I've had so much trouble with the depression since then. It's been almost as limiting as the pain.

I noticed that a lot of really sweet people are recommending hobbies and things, and I just wanted to put in a word and say that I know from experience that sometimes those tools are ineffective against a depression that is chemical, rather than just circumstantial. It may be that antidepressants help you, if it's been a chronic problem; be sure to give them a couple months to work before you give up on them. (That said, they do bad things to me, too, so don't be ashamed to STOP medication if you need to.)
I can't say I've found any cures for the depression yet, but I've found a few tricks to circumvent it sometimes. I agree with Siderea about video games; I've definitely managed to break out of a really bad place with some Twilight Princess on several occasions. Sometimes I get on twitter and make jokes about my depression and it helps me to feel better. What I've found is that momentum is the most valuable thing. If I can get out of bed, or start doing something interesting (even if it's just reading webcomics) then I tend to feel better, so long as it's something that's not too challenging or frustrating by nature.
Maybe those things will help, and maybe not; hopefully you'll find something that works for you.
 

links56

Distinguished member
Joined
Oct 29, 2013
Messages
177
Reason
DX FIBRO
Diagnosis
01/2013
Country
US
State
IL
It's just so hard some days. I hate feeling lazy, but it's so hard to get motivation. It's definitely worse in the winter, too. It's hard to know which doctor to change too. It's like you have to go through it all from the beginning again, and then they may or may not help you.
 

mariposa

Senior member
Joined
Apr 19, 2013
Messages
459
Diagnosis
00/0000
Country
USA
State
PA
It's just so hard some days. I hate feeling lazy, but it's so hard to get motivation. It's definitely worse in the winter, too. It's hard to know which doctor to change too. It's like you have to go through it all from the beginning again, and then they may or may not help you.

I'm sorry that you're having to go through this. :( I just read through this thread and see some good suggestions here. Bottom line is that you'll need to try different things out to see what works for you and that's different for everyone.

It stinks that you're dealing with depression along with the fibro, but they often go hand in hand. I think maybe finding things that will help one issue will help the other... maybe in just a small way, but it's a start, right? :confused:

Yes, I know that winter can be nasty when it comes to fibro. There are heated blankets and mats that help some people.

Have you considered massage? That also helps some people and if you get it done by students, the cost is considerably lower.

Bottom line, I'm glad you're here and I hope you'll find lots of support here. If you read through what's already here, you'll find a bunch of things to try out and see how they work for you.
 

sassy13

Active member
Joined
Nov 18, 2013
Messages
51
Diagnosis
06/2011
Country
USA
State
Tennessee
Links,
I understand what you are going through. I'm battling a bout of depression too. I have been reading posts and even joined a depression forum. I know I need to, but I have not found a psychiatrist yet. I just cannot handle one more medical expense.
I know it is hard, I have Fibromyalgia, Chronic Fatigue syndrome, psoriatic arthritis and a rare autoimmune liver disease called PBC. So, I know where you are coming from. It is so hard to get loved ones to understand how you feel and how hard it is some days just to get out of bed.
I operate on The Spoon Theory. You can google it, but it means everything we do requires a spoon such as showering, dressing, etc. Everyday when I wake, I decide how to spend my energy or spoons. If I have a sporting event to go to for the evening, I have to take it easy during the day to make it. It really stinks having to budget energy, but I have found I am less likely to suffer a flare. When I I over do it one day, I will pay dearly the next.
My children understand the spoon theory. If they see me lying down they know Mom is at the end of her spoons.
As far as pain is concerned, I started off on the narcotics route. It was a mistake for me because I became addicted adding just one more problem. I honestly liked the euphoric feeling and the energy they gave me. Fortunatey my PCP called me on it and I got help and got off the narcotics. I now take Lyrica and long acting Tramadol. I try to stretch, do yoga, walk, sit in the hot tub-my favorite!
Glad you found the forum. It is nice to seek advice from those competent to give it.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Top