Hello, courage there, I know how your feel as a sufferer my self for many years.. but there will be improvements if you keep up your moral and health. by that i mean doing things no matter how small that give you pleasure, do some things just for you... also try not to get too dependant on drugs like pain killers as their side effects will create other problems.. ive stopped taking tramadol, that i was taking morning and night plus ixprim that has tramadol whenever i needed it during the day...this gave me stomach problems, IBS, no libido, i suffer with short term memory loss, confusion, i get flustered with paperwork and just cant cope with too much going on at once...the lockdown doesn't actually bother me as its quiet, and i can get on with the things i want to do at my own pace..Pain caused my fibro is very disabling BUT you can if you are mentally strong, overcome the urge to just take more pills. tramadol can become addictive and like many drugs eventually the body starts to ignore it or become dependant on it.
Neither is good, so by training yourself to not focus on the pain directly, but mentally isolate yourself from the background pain at least, and only take pain killers when you are really in need, you can become less dependant on them. Next you have to really accept what your body is doing, in my case i get severe neck pain, and lower back pain all the time and sudden stabs of pain in my legs, , hands that cramp up or go numb, attacks of IBS if i get cold, its straight off to the bathroom.., i cant kneel, i have to lay down on my side to do any job that requires me to get down. confusion, i often go into my workshop and then cant remember straight away what i went in there for...if people ask too many questions at once i just get stressed, and so on and on ... But ive told my self that the sudden "phantom pains" those violent pains are just my nervous system telling me lies.
There is nothing wrong with the part of my body where i felt the sudden pain as it's gone just as quickly...fibro is like a bad connection in an audio amplifier, you get constant pain noise, sudden pops and crackles, then nothing for a while, then it starts playing up again.. you feel like giving it a good hard whack to stop the constant variation in output...well fibro for me is like that...you just have to mentally try and ignore it..
By me stopping the painkillers overnight i slowly got the side effects to reduce and have less effect. I know im going to get constant background pain, ive accepted that and concentrate on doing things for me, so i can get some mental satisfaction from doing something for me..
Get social help to try and resolve the overload of problems that are worrying you, there are very good people out there that will help you over a period of time to reduce your worries.. I still carry a plastic tub for emergencies with an antidepressant to help if i get a panic attack, as ive been hospitalised several times with those. and ixprim in case im out and the pain in my neck or back is preventing me from being able to walk or drive. but for the most of the day i just ignore the background pain even though it restricts my movements..
I also suffer from apnea and get out of breath if i try and do any thing like manual work, i cant run, dig, saw, puch, or pull anything that requires any effort, and this is probably the thing that annoys me the most. but i have just told myself that i just have to ask for help to do those things and my family are very helpful. I also ride my motorcycle, that gives me great pleasures and a real feeling of freedom, where i can for a few hours leave all my worries behind.. My IBS is really reduced, and my libido is far better. i get more done, though i can still spend far too much time in bed through being so tired, but nothing like before i was diagnosed with apnea and now use a machine at night.
Fortunately for me, I have many many hobbies, i've always been active physically and intellectually, so i've just adjusted myself to how i do the things i used to do.. ive gone from electric tools to air tools as they are lighter and easier to manipulate. so i can still do my repair maintenance and building my projects, ( actually building a metal, half size sherman tank, slowly) if i actually force my self to go out into the workshop and start doing something, it's like a new me...i will either just do a little job or ill be working for hours until i get too tired , but will have the satisfaction of having progressed and achieved something...even if i fail, i know that ive tried and learnt from the result that i need to rethink and do it a different way.. keeping the brain active with solving little problems that aren't impossible to resolve. redesigning something so it works better.. all those things work well to make you feel better and that you've achieved something, not just got through another day.
Slowly bit by bit i get better and better, even though fibro comes and goes, and it always comes back again. but ive beaten it for a period on my terms.. that's so rewarding.. on my terms...that's important for your moral..because you have been in control not the fibro..
Its like having a leg amputated, its regrettable and will never grow back, but your alive, and can still get about one way or another..get over it, like amputées do, its not going to change, but you can.. you have to accept it and move on..
So i hope i can encourage you to not stay focused on the pain and strain of fibro but to fight back and not let it overwhelm your every moment, you are far too good for that. writing this ive ignored the pain in my legs, lower back and neck. im in isolation because of the virus covid19 so i m not getting my two physio sessions i have every week, that really help me relax as well. so im doing little things that give me pleasure, I had to give up playing the guitar, so i took up playing the harmonica instead .. i moved on..
finally here is a poem i wrote to a girl called tracy, who like you suffered from fibro..I hope it helps..
Now listen up tracy, I hear your pain
you symptoms are getting you down again
you feel so useless, unwanted and stressed
but deep down inside you are one of the best
we all have to suffer in each our own way
pain from fibromalgia that wont go away
so what if we can't do as much as before
do ironing,make beds or hoover the floor
we still have our eyes that beauty can see
the pleasure in others we can share their glee
make fun of our problems cos there here to stay
we still can help others, for them we can pray
so what little i can do, i do so with pride
even if afterward from the pain i cried
but doing things when ever my body allowed
what i can still do, it still makes me proud
i have learn't how to do things a different way
with a new set of tools that are here to stay
just a few hours hours work and im all done in
but iv'e done my best and with that ill win
ill keep on going and so will you, that's the plan
because that's what we are here for to do what we can
so puck us there tracey there is lots left to do
and take one job at a time, you will work your way through
we are not measured by failure, but what we have done
not by the dozen, but one by one
so do what you can do, and do it with pride
don't ever let fibromalgia shorten your stride.