Help I've upset my wife (who has Fibro) - URGENT!

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paulfoel

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Looking for an insight from those of you suffer with this....

I didnt mean to but I do find it difficult sometimes.

Im sure you're all aware of this no-one can see how bad you are. No excuses but I've been working long hours this week and am really tired. Stupidly I made a comment that it was ok for her she had a day off today so could sleep all day but I had to go to work. (We pay for childminder few days a week so wife can rest).

Shes gone ballistic to say the least!

I guess some of you have had it in your time. I suppose its just frustrating to feel so ill but everyone thinks you're just lazy. I get that why wife is so upset.

Normally I understand. And I do my best to arrange childcare, someone to clean the house. I was just so tired last night and, I suppose, a bit jealous that she had all day at home. Not good from me.

I really dont want her to be upset over this and think I'm like everyone else. Please help.....
 

diamond

Legendary member
Joined
Sep 18, 2015
Messages
1,548
Reason
DX FIBRO
Diagnosis
01/2008
Country
UK
State
anywhere
I see both sides....everyone makes mistakes...keep apologising and let your wife calm down.

Spoil her a bit do something nice make a meal buy her favourite flowers.

I can only speak for myself but fibro pain and fatigue day after day is nothing like you being exhaused...it can be unberable.

I can understand why she is so upset firstly because understanding for some reason to many of us is really important.....secondly your wife is not having a nice pleasant rest then recovering like you would.

Dont be envious i promise you if you had this illness for a week you would be begging to go back to healthy but exhausted now and again.

Also dont be too hard on yourself..you are human and 'our invisible illness' is not in the forefront of your mind 24/7 like for us.

Hope things settle soon...give her extra attention and get some rest yourself.

Maybe a friend or family member would give you some chill out time too.... together or separately sometimes. Take Care
 

Forgetmenot

Legendary member
Joined
Oct 6, 2014
Messages
1,549
Reason
DX FIBRO
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70/2010
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Hertfordshire
Everyone needs to feel there feeling matter,
You can't spend your life walking on eggshells with your wife ,this is something we have to live with,and we should try in turn to understand how the other ppl in our life's have to change there lives to suit us.
No one is going to give u a gold medel for looking after your wife,but that does not mean know one should assume you should go all out 365 days of the year without a slip up.
Clearly you love her to bits or u wouldn't be sitting here feeling so rotten .
Maybe sit her down and explain to her that this illness affect both of you.
Truth is we the fibro suffers feel bad for not being what we should be.and we take it out on you.in turn you get fed up trying to do everything you can with a sence that this is a live time illness and you are never going to walk in and find your wife with a Hoover in one hand and a duster in the other,while you smell a wonderful homemade pie in the oven.
If all else fails ,why don't you get her to join our site,we would love to have her X .you can stick around to ,if u feel u need somewhere to vent.
 

Lana

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Joined
Apr 6, 2014
Messages
223
Reason
DX FIBRO
Diagnosis
05/2012
Country
CA
State
ON
At least she is working. I couldn't take it anymore and had to quit.
 

harpert

Active member
Joined
Feb 26, 2016
Messages
56
Reason
DX FIBRO
Diagnosis
07/2014
Country
US
State
IN
Talk to her, share your feelings. I am sure she will understand. Let her know that you are not belittling her illness and that at times it gets difficult for you too. You have support each other!
 

diamond

Legendary member
Joined
Sep 18, 2015
Messages
1,548
Reason
DX FIBRO
Diagnosis
01/2008
Country
UK
State
anywhere
I don't think this guy is coming back for our replies..shame I always get momentarily involved and then wonder what has happened.

Hope he joins us again.
 
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