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JKerner59

Active member
Joined
May 1, 2014
Messages
80
Reason
DX FIBRO
Diagnosis
00/0000
Country
US
State
FL
Just got back home today..had been visiting my sister for a few months to helps with my elderly mom....you know, I never thought about how often I rest or nap in my own house but I was hit with a verbal assault from my sister about my health that knocked me for a loop..

First let me say that I am a smoker (started at 40 years old..I know insane) which is a horrible habit and yes, I know I need to quit. That said..I never really thought about the way I live...meaning resting a lot when I can or sleeping due to the fibro...it's just my husband and I (and the dog) and we are both home bodies so I've never thought about anyone being offended by the way I live.

OMG! I woke up from a two hour nap, walked into the kitchen, and my sister just laid into me...you are always sick...you sleep too much...it's the smoking....it was UGLY! I was so taken aback..this happened last Wednesday and I have felt like I wanted to throw up since then due to the emotional impact the tirade had on me. My sister and I have always had a great relationship (so I thought) so this is killing me.

I try not to say much about the pain I am in at times with fibro and how the fatigue affects me and for some reason the past six months, I seem to be getting infections (sinus, strep, tonsilitus)....

Plainly said...I felt like a piece of stepped on toilet paper when she finished her tirade...like it was ALL my fault that I don't feel well...thank goodness for this forum...I think we try to act as normal as possible under the circumstances we are faced with each day...

:cry: thanks for the ear!
 

ramsvcu

Member
Joined
May 18, 2014
Messages
21
Reason
DX FIBRO
Diagnosis
05/2014
Country
US
State
VA
I can relate to how you feel. My co-workers dont understand my pain, so I have stopped talking about it. My family didnt have much sympathy either. I think they cant understand how bad it is and think I am just complaining for the sake of complaining. Even my pain specialist doesnt get it. I think people have to feel the pain for themselves to be able to relate.
 

snckrs

Active member
Joined
May 6, 2014
Messages
39
Reason
DX FIBRO
Diagnosis
03/2012
Country
US
State
Maryland
You are not a peice of stepped on toilet paper. All the horrible things you are feeling about youself, you are not those horrible things. I do not want to speak ill of your sister, but she obviously doesn't understand fibromyalgia and what you go through. I think all of us since beign diagnossed with fibro have had a family member go off on us. And it is obviously hurtfull menteally and emotionally. I am sorry this happened to you and if you need anything. You let me know. Snckrs
 

Loftpat

Senior member
Joined
Aug 12, 2013
Messages
374
Reason
DX FIBRO
Diagnosis
08/2013
Country
US
State
ME
I'm sorry your sister went off on you. It's hard enough at times to feel physically decent without emotional stress. Hugs.
 

Trellum

Legendary member
Joined
Jul 17, 2013
Messages
1,788
Reason
DX FIBRO
Diagnosis
04/2011
Country
NL
State
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I can relate, I thought that my boyfriend being completely careless was bad, but at least he doesn't verbally assault me. I feel so sorry for you tho. It really hurts when that kind of things come from the people you love and care about the most. I truly think your sister didn't mean bad tho, I think she actually meant good, she is probably very worried about you... so I'd try not to take it so personal if i were you.

Sometimes our loved ones have a funny way to show us how much they care about us, I think this is the case here! I just think she is worried, but didn't think thru how she wanted to express that. She used a very wrong set of words, she might not even know it... even up until now.
 

JKerner59

Active member
Joined
May 1, 2014
Messages
80
Reason
DX FIBRO
Diagnosis
00/0000
Country
US
State
FL
Thanks everyone for your kind comments...the support helps my huritng heart!
 

DDavies

Member
Joined
Apr 13, 2014
Messages
21
Reason
DX FIBRO
Diagnosis
12/2013
Country
US
State
NC
The stress of caring for your mom also plays into your sister's mood. I'm not saying it excuses her behavior in any way; I'm saying it plays a part and this isn't all about you and what you may/may not have done. Don't take responsibility for other people's actions, you have enough to worry about.
 
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