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Siderea

Senior member
Joined
Oct 22, 2013
Messages
231
Diagnosis
10/2013
Country
US
State
ND
Long story short, I'm a founding member of a young adult group at my church. The group likes to meet in each other's homes. I agreed quite a while ago to host this month's social at my house. When I agreed to this schedule, I wasn't quite so exhausted and I had a lot more passion for the group. I knew I was sick, I was already diagnosed, but I guess I assumed I'd be better by now.

I don't want to cancel, because I need friends in my life despite the pain and suffering I go through. So I want to find a way to be the most passive host possible while still creating a good time for everyone. It's already a potluck, and it's game night, so the entertainment is already picked out. I should be OK even if I'm not energetic.

But... I know I'll be over exhausted the next day. I'll have to recover from the party.

Am I torturing myself, or am I actually doing myself some good by doing something healthy people do?

I'm creating a lot of stress, and I can't handle stress well at this point. I'm probably going to regret this, despite the need I have for friendship.
 
While this party may cause some additional pain/fatigue, I personally think it's a good idea to surround yourself with some level of normalacy and to just have some plain old fun! In my opinion, some times, it's worth having to take a day or two to recover if it's an activity you're interested in and will have some fun with. Especially because it isn't extremely physically demanding... I'd say as long as you're not in too bad of a flare before or during, try to go ahead with the party, it might do you some good mebtally/emotionally to have some fun and just laugh! I hope it goes smoothly and that you have a great time!
 
Sorry to hear your still not feeling better, and now a party to host. Maybe you could get some of your friend's to chip in and help with some of the more stressful preparations and thus make things a little easier on you. Here is a little help:

STRESS RELIEVING KIT
1. Eraser- Mistakes disappear
2. Penny- So you're never broke
3. Marbles- In case you lose yours.
4. Rubber Band- To stretch yourself.
5. Paper Clip- To hold things together.
6. Hugs and Smiles- To remember that we all care about you. :)

Hope your event goes well and your pain and fatigue does not drag you down. Good Luck!
 
Go for it and have a good time with some friends. Life is too short to miss out on things that are important to us. That being said try to get some rest before and pace yourself during the party. Sounds like you could use some fun right now. Good luck. Mike.
 
Thanks everyone! I won't stress about it, but instead let myself look forward to it. When others with chronic fatigue say to go ahead and do something requiring so much energy, then I think I will!
 
That's the spirit! Hope you have a blast! Let us know how it goes! :D
 
You can do it! I just hosted Easter for 20 at my new house. I was feeling exactly like you, and almost cancelled. Like you it was pot luck so I didn't have to cook a lot, just get the house prepared, tables set up etc, I did stress way to much and took more than a few pain relievers the day before and day of getting things ready. Since most people hadn't been to our new home every room had to be presentable, aaackkkk. But I got the whole family to pitch in for there "areas", as well as the rest of the house.

But even though I was exhausted last night and haven't done much today other than watch tv and get on the computer I am so proud if myself that I did something so "normal" like the old me. Go for it and if you have to adjust your standards or the way you do things ( before I would have decorated everything Easter themed, this year I just settled for pastel disposable table clothes and cups all my decorations stayed in the attic). It will be great and you will feel mentally recharged afterwards .
 
Siderea, whenever I know I have something important coming up, you know what I do? I just take a deep breath, exhale and say: whatever will be will be whether I'm there or not. So I just do whatever I have to do without thinking that much about it.

I know this might sound vague to some, but over the years I've developed a coping system... I no longer think too much about things. Like for example dreading certain dates because I know that day I will have to go somewhere, meet someone or just do something I don't like that much. It's really that simple... take tings as they come :) You will be fine!
 
While I've never actually been in that situation on a bad period personally. I know a friend who has. At the end of the day he just gritted his teeth and got on with it. A question I've often considered is what do an engaged couple do if someone suddenly falls ill on the wedding day. The response I often hear is a similar one of gritting teeth and getting on with it. Do whatever it takes, to get through it, but mention that you won't be able to do it again.
 
Thanks for the support! The party was last night and went very well. Several people showed up who are "the life of the party," and so I could stay calm and not worry about entertaining. We had great conversation, played games, and enjoyed food and drink. I'm really glad I hosted, because it allowed me to socialize while being in my comfort zone, knowing my pills and safe foods are readily avaliabe if needed.

But I did make a mistake. I drank Numi's Chocolate black tea thought the evening to help me stay alert and energized. It worked! I wasn't energetic, but I didn't crash during the party. But... I slept terribly last night. I was awake for most of the night even after taking extra sleeping herbs,which normally knock me out in a strong way. So I'm useless today. I'm just vegetating on the couch in my jammies. :p
 
Thanks for the support! The party was last night and went very well. Several people showed up who are "the life of the party," and so I could stay calm and not worry about entertaining. We had great conversation, played games, and enjoyed food and drink. I'm really glad I hosted, because it allowed me to socialize while being in my comfort zone, knowing my pills and safe foods are readily avaliabe if needed.

But I did make a mistake. I drank Numi's Chocolate black tea thought the evening to help me stay alert and energized. It worked! I wasn't energetic, but I didn't crash during the party. But... I slept terribly last night. I was awake for most of the night even after taking extra sleeping herbs,which normally knock me out in a strong way. So I'm useless today. I'm just vegetating on the couch in my jammies. :p


That's great to hear! I thought you might enjoy yourself :)

I'm sorry to hear the tea messed with your sleep though! That stinks! But at least it's the weekend (hopefully you don't work weekends lol) and you can rest up today and tomorrow!

Proud of you for tuffing it out and actually enjoying yourself!
 
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