Mental despair

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Sandra dee

New member
Joined
Apr 24, 2021
Messages
8
Reason
DX FIBRO
Diagnosis
07/2020
Country
UK
does everyone get this dreaded mental fog? I don't know if it is because I am elderly, I seem to suffer quite badly with it.
I laughing tell my husband that I am brain dead as I feel I am trying to think through treacle.
When it is really bad I cannot concentrate on anything. I keep hoping that the flare ups do not last very long. It is very hard to keep positive when you feel like you are dragging your mind as well as your body around!
 
Hi Sandra, I completely sympathize with you on this. I have times when I can't remember the last name of someone I have known for 10 years and it drives me a little crazy. I also have whole days of brain fog, and can't seem to get anything done right.

I guess this is another one of those things we simply have to get used to. I don't know if those brain games that are supposed to make your brain work better would have any effect, in fact I don't know if they work on anyone, fibro or not. I've never tried them because I don't like sitting and doing puzzles or games like that.

It is very hard for many if not most of us to keep a positive attitude. It's very hard for me, and I am the one always urging people to be as positive as they can be. Some days it is easier to be positive than others. We just have to do our best. And on days when we can't do our best......just accept that this is a bad day and let it be a bad day and no need to try to pretend it's anything else.

If the brain fog lasts a long time and never lets up and is really interfering in your life you might want to get tested for other things to make sure it's not a cognitive thing or a brain thing rather than fibro that is causing it. Don't know how long your flare of this typically is, but if it goes on for weeks without any let-up you should see a doctor about it. Just because we have fibro doesn't mean every single thing we experience is caused by fibro, and sometimes we need to get check to find out if it is or not. Some doctors like to attribute everything to fibro, but it isn't necessarily the case all the time.
 
I seem to have Fibro Fog all the time, it's just a matter of degree because with me it gets far worse when I'm anxious/stressed, which seeing as I share my very small home (one bed flat) with a homeless family member who has serious mental health issues which have been exacerbated by the Covid lock downs, as mine have & most, if not all, of us likewise, I am stressed all the time.

When it's at it's worst I forget what I'm doing in the middle of doing it, or immediately forget what I was going to do just as I decided I'm going to do it as it needs doing.
I lose my phone, house keys etc all the time which of course stresses me out even more & what I find most frustrating is struggling to find the right words when I'm speaking to someone ie I can refer to an object or person I know well in my mind but can't name the person or the object etc.
I find that really scary.

Every night I have to write myself a note with what day/date it will be tomorrow with a list of what shopping I may need to go get & what chores etc I'm intending to do or I'd wake confused not sure about anything.

I do online crosswords to try keep my brain active & I write emails to friends etc, as I seem to be better at writing than I am speaking now.

Am also nervous about saying the wrong thing as I seem to be doing that a lot & then thinking..."Why on earth did I say that?"

I'm anxious with phone calls I have to make to the likes of internet/phone service providers & don't even mention filling-in forms,
that's a total nightmare for me, even though I have two University Degrees & a recent Passport Renewal procedure that went wrong
(of course it did), nearly ended up with me under sedation!

My phone rings I get anxious, the mail arrives I get anxious & if there's someone knocking at the door I get beyond anxious.

I will add that looking in the mirror or at photos of myself I look as if I've aged decades in a short space of time, thus proving that
stress is ageing - then I get depressed about that!

Now I've written all this down am thinking I must be much worse than I thought I was so am going to stop now!



I try to assure myself that it's just the Fibro Fog made worse by anxiety but I'm also haunted by the knowledge that both my mother & maternal grandmother, as well as many of my other family members, succumed to Alzheimers & that's a Bete Noire that's stalking me.

So I get anxious about that & that, of course, makes it worse!
 
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Rainbow, I really feel for you.
Try not to feel alone in this, because many of us here experience many of the same things you do. Also, I have talked to several people who don't have fibro and they are also feeling awkward and anxious about talking to people, are forgetting things, losing things, feeling fog, or experiencing a lot of stress. I think many people all over the world are experiencing variations of this because right now we are in a sort of- maybe---well, carefully....can we?....sort of transition between lockdown and what will eventually be a new normal way of life. This is very pervasive. I have read articles about it, and so on.

My point being that the world wide circumstances are affecting hundreds of thousands of people in this way. And for those of us who have fibro, it is probably worse because we already have those issues at the best of times!

I have found a couple of things that help. One is, of course, to work harder than ever to keep my stress level down as much as I can. another is to try to find things I can treat myself to (like....I actually went to a movie! I was the only one in the whole theater, and it was great.)

Another thing I just realized recently: If I try to act normal around people (the normal we used to have) I just get more tense. So instead, I decided one time to embrace my awkwardness and really embody it and put it right out there.
So, I was in a group of people who all know each other, but together for the first time in over a year, and I just addressed the group and said, "You know, I am feeling incredibly awkward here. I feel as if I have completely forgotten how to talk to people, and no longer know how to behave properly in a group!" And it turned out every single other person there felt the same way, and that eased a lot of the tension. Not all, but a lot. I don't even try to act "normal" any more.

I also don't look at myself in the mirror unless I really have to.
I have to check my list of things I need to do every day. Sometimes three times a day.
I write myself a note if I have to do something in the morning so when I get up I don't forget.
Etc.
I have asked others, who don't have fibro, and some of them are doing the same things, when they never had to before.

Sorry for such a long post. But one more thing: a tip about the phone and keys. Especially with the keys, decide on a place (I like a hook in the wall just inside the door) and always, always, put them there as soon as you walk in the door. That way you cannot possibly lose them. As for the phone, I only keep mine in one of three places, all of them in the living room, even if I have to go out of my way to make sure I put it in one of those places. No exceptions. If you have a very small place, make it just one place. That way you never lose the phone.

Take heart. You probably are not going into dementia, just experiencing the same discombobulation every one else is feeling, exacerbated by fibro. It may very well get better. :)
 
I completely get what you''re saying. The past few months, my Fibro symptoms have been worse in general and that includes the brain fog. I have been much more depressed and anxious as well and not getting acupuncture for the past year and hardly sleeping ever have taken their toll. The past week has been much better as I'm trying a new medication at night that has really helped my pain. It has been almost a miracle and I am feeling so much better. I am very grateful. But the brain fog continues and I start to get concerned as I am almost 67 and maybe my brain is just fading! It's been more "name finding" and my brain almost hurts when I try to think of something like that.
 
Such a depressing days these past few months has been but maybe this is also because of everything that's happening around.
 
Such a depressing days these past few months has been but maybe this is also because of everything that's happening around.
I have read a lot of articles, mostly the NYT and the NPR website, and they are saying there is a very high percentage of the population having problems these days. One article said that in 2019 about 16 percent of the population of the USA identified as depressed, and in December of 2020 that number was over 40%. Almost half the people in the US are depressed. I don't find that hard to believe at all.

It's been a very rough year-and-some and it's really not getting that much better yet. We can realistically anticipate that it will get better at some point but we are also all aware of how things can turn for the bad any time.

I know that, even though I tend toward chronic depression, what I have felt this past year has been different and in some ways worse than usual. So I would agree that if you are having an extra bad time now it's at least in part because of things going on in the world.
 
I have read a lot of articles, mostly the NYT and the NPR website, and they are saying there is a very high percentage of the population having problems these days. One article said that in 2019 about 16 percent of the population of the USA identified as depressed, and in December of 2020 that number was over 40%. Almost half the people in the US are depressed. I don't find that hard to believe at all.

It's been a very rough year-and-some and it's really not getting that much better yet. We can realistically anticipate that it will get better at some point but we are also all aware of how things can turn for the bad any time.

I know that, even though I tend toward chronic depression, what I have felt this past year has been different and in some ways worse than usual. So I would agree that if you are having an extra bad time now it's at least in part because of things going on in the world.
Good insights
 
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