my fibro story - summary.

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Leigh Blyth

Feb 4, 2018
Hi everybody.

I'm new to the forum but very familiar with pain and depression....

This is an excerpt from my website (still under construction but I don't know when it'll ever be finished!) based on my recovery from nearly 20 years of depression and a lifetime of physical pain.....

My 'fibro' diagnosis is both self-diagnosed and retrospective.   I was too young to voice my pain when it started.

From the sudden itches and biting sensations, jolts of electricity shooting through my limbs, the pins and needles, the intense spasms and stabbing pains.

The aching limbs that exhausted quickly, the cramps, the 'stitches' in my sides whenever I ran, regularly waking with a stiff neck.

These were all just a part of normal life to me.   I had no pain-free time to compare to and I saw other people in pain, so it didn't even occur to me there shouldn't be pain.

As individual symptoms they were easily dismissed - I must have sat/slept funny, I'd overdone it, I'd injured myself (I was both clumsy and adventurous).   If I had an explanation for the pain once, I didn't mention it again (peril of a quick learner).   The weird sensations and spasms came and went, curiosities - observing the pain as my foot would spasm - How long could I bear it? What toe be pulled in what direction this time?.

The painful knees by the time I was 8, my back pain classified as chronic at 14. There was constant pain of one sort or another.

I kept on going, adding more damage to my body which became increasingly imbalanced and tense due to the adaptations in my connective tissue. Layer upon layer of restrictions bracing me and holding me rigid restrictive, like a scaffold.   Zig-zagging from left to right, inside to out, front to back.

Chains of tension - twisting and and kinking, compressing and tensing, the whole length of my body as it tried to remain 'upright'. I didn't appreciate how much movement I lacked until I started to regain it.

The physical tensions throughout my body, caused a lot of pain and weird sensations.

At some point I started to struggle to believe the pain was real.   That I was not faking it (for attention? I tried not to be sympathy seeking), or imagining it somehow.   Life couldn't really be this painful.  I doubted myself, hypochondria

The chronic pain left me in a deep depression that lasted nearly 2 decades, the overwhelming feelings of failure and despair constantly with me. I found no joy in anything, a deep sadness always there, with the stress and anger bubbling away, I blamed myself for everything.

But I feel so much better now, it's taken over 2 years of hard work, I've crunched cracked and cried my way though all the pain I'd been carrying around.

A life-long list of body-wide, pain-related symptoms and nearly 20 years of depression, because I did not use my main muscles of movement and had no connection to my Base-Line muscles.

I had no internal reference for body alignment.   No guide to re-set back to Base-Line healthy after trauma.   The damage my body experienced stayed with me - a progression of pain and stored trauma.

I learned to use my body correctly, focusing on my Base-Line pelvic floor and rectus abdominis muscles.

then the gluteus maximus and rectus femoris muscles connecting my Base-Line to my legs,

The trapezius muscles connect the upper body to Base-Line support.

Focus on learning to feel these muscles working, develop your sense of conscious proprioception

"The ability to sense the position of your body in space and being aware of where you should be able to move."

Feel how to heal.

Fibro is fixable with time and focus.
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