Don't worry about it too much. When I was first dianosed I felt similar way, but because I was dianosed I've found my way here which I wish I knew about it long time ago. Cause it took me 5 years to find it. You made a very smart moved.
It's only natural the way you're reacting to the dianosed. I was in the blank moded at first when I've heard that I've fibro. Who wound't? It's a confusing illnesses/disorders that didn't look anything like it is! or was! or will! .
It's also very unpredictable. It can be claim now but just in an instant it can flip your life upside down one day then the rest of your life will follow. It's great to be prepare first believe me. I wish I had before I lost so much.
Maybe sometime you might feel like you need to experincing the situation first before you could fully understand the half of what some member are talking about. But you'll never know what might comes in handy :smile: