PhD student/instructor at the end of the semester, so... crazy?

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New member
Apr 16, 2016
Hi, everyone- new here (but not new to fibro) and looking for community. I'm in my mid-30s and in the last few weeks of my seventh straight year of college- I went back in 2009 to complete a BA, then turned around and went into an MA program after graduation, THEN turned around and started a PhD program after getting the MA. Both my graduate degrees were/are fully funded, although that shouldn't be confused with 'well-paid', and this year as part of my PhD package I also added teaching to my workload. I'm living the "you should count your blessings" dream with a vengeance, for sure.

Right now I feel like I'm half a breath away from completely falling apart. I'm starting to seriously think I made a mistake in not giving myself any kind of break between degrees, but now if I were to step away it would cause so many OTHER problems that I really want to keep trying to get through. I'm so far behind in one class that the professors are saying I don't yet meet the requirements for them to give me an incomplete, so I'm exhausting myself every single day just trying to make even minor progress on that work. I DID finish all my grading and everything my students need from me today, so now I'm able to focus on the mountain of work ahead for the classes I'm taking- I've been doing better than previous years as far as crippling anxiety and panic attacks, but it's starting to get tight.

I have a lot of general support from friends and family and my partner, but those in my life who have fibro themselves have all accepted a reduced state of living I'm just not okay with at this point, and those who don't have it... well, you know- they try and we love them, but sometimes it's so frustrating to have to try to be more than superficially understood.

I'm doing as much as I can to be a Good Fibro Patient (tm), and since my new therapist suggested I check out some of the discussion fora to see if I can meet other grad students and academics, here I am!
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