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missnicky

New member
Joined
Dec 4, 2017
Messages
1
Reason
DX FIBRO
Diagnosis
12/2017
Country
NZ
State
Auckland
Hi everyone,
So after years of living with constant pain, I have finally been diagnosed with fibro. Or rather, I was diagnosed a few months back but now it's starting to get real so it's time to climb out of denial. Which is not just a river in Egypt. Haha.
I guess I'm looking to connect with other solo mums (my boy is 14) as well as get a feel for how people manage working, parenting, all the chores and possibly part time study next year.
I work 20 hrs a week at the mo and I gotta say, the wheels are coming off - I can't keep up, I've had so many sick days my boss is angry, the pain from just sitting at my desk is almost unbearable. The insomnia is killing me. I have about 2 good hours between 10am and midday where I'm alert and perky and it's downhill from there. I can hardly stay upright by 3pm.
It's definitely getting worse. Any advice would be super. So sorry for the length of this - I don't have anyone to talk to that understands.

Many thanks
 
Welcome missnicky....im not a single Mum...well not anymore as my son is now adult although i remember those teenage years well.

If i could give you any advice is take as much care of yourself as possible....ask for help with heavy chores if possible and do things in bite size chunks and rest in between.

You sound very determined taking on extra study on top....i can only applaud you for trying to keep all these wheels spinning.

Think carefully about not pushing yourself beyond your limitations.....its more slow and steady wins the race..and the race might be just doing the washing up!

There are many people on here who are able to give you tips and encouragement and many who do live very productive lives despite fibro.

Also if things are getting to much maybe your doctor or rheumy can offer some therapies that may help....there is all sorts of things that may help and no two people with fibro respond the same.

Pain clinics are also not just about medications but emotional support and learning how to adapt your life to your new situation...some can help you access other things like hydro therapy...massage etc after fully assessing your needs.

If you have family or friends willing to help....now is the time to accept it..maybe help with house chores or amusing your son while you have a complete rest sometimes.

Welcome and take care.
 
Like Diamond, my kids are grown but, I did go to school while working full time with kids still at home. (While living with FM) I was tired for sure however I just sucked it up and plugged along thinking it’s the name of the game. I work shift work with long unpredictable hours so I was used to feeling tired. (My work is in prehospital care). My love for my profession was the fuel to keep me going.

Your son is old enough to have regular chores assigned to him. This will teach him valuable life lessons on how to contribute to the running of a household in addition to learning responsibility and prepare him for what future employers will expect from him. As well, sit down with your son ( if you haven’t already) and explain to him about FM and how it impacts you. He is old enough to know this. I understand that as parents we seek to protect our children from grown up problems but when it comes to a health issue that will impact your daily life your son would benefit from a discussion. Again, he will learn empathy. Life lessons. With this in mind, consider having a discussion with other family members.

Pace yourself. This will be a work in progress. Each of us has different tolerance levels and you will learn yours. Try to head to bed same time every night. A regular schedule helps. Exercise. To some, this sounds counter intuitive but physical activity really does help control pain. It doesn’t cure it, but it helps. Inactivity only makes us more tired, exacerbates pain and contributes to depression. Be careful not to overdo it as you will hit the perverbial wall and perhaps set you back weeks.

If you haven’t already, engage in a discussion with your Dr about the different medications and treatments offered to FM patients. Many have found the right combination that helped deal with their symptoms thus gaining a greater quality of life. Sometimes this takes awhile. In the end it may be worth it.

The good news is FM is not a terminal illness, annoying, and sadly in many cases greatly impacts patients quality of lives. You will have your ups and downs along with learning curves. Try to keep a positive attitude and sense of humour. This will help you navigate this nasty condition.

Please feel free to hang out here. We, on this forum are walking the walk so can give you a sympathetic listening ear. Validation goes a long way. Along with listening to you hopefully we can positively encourage you. It’s this positivity that will fuel you to keep pressing forward. Thanks for joining this forum and welcome to our exclusive club ;)
 
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