wedel
New member
- Joined
- Feb 25, 2016
- Messages
- 6
- Reason
- DX FIBRO
- Diagnosis
- 02/2016
- Country
- US
- State
- TX
the primary care refered me to a rheumatologist, that appointment is friday. said she didnt want to tag me with fibromyalgia but felt confident that is what i am dealing with. all of the typical symptoms, a gazillion tests, co-pays, and all of the usual attempts to figure out what is wrong with me have been completed.
the length of time i have been riding on the struggle bus is partially my fault, I began experiencing symptoms over 10 years ago, it has just taken me a long time to be willing to put the pieces together. i think that i am in a denial/anger phase and for a host of reasons...first and foremost my mom has fibro and 20+ years into it is now heavily addicted to narcotics. not making a judgement about her pain, treatment plan or anything other than how the addiction has impacted me and my kiddos. i honestly feel a tremendous amout of saddness for her and the path she is on. i have watched her isolate herself, refuse help, go against sound medical advice and spiral out of control.
it is very difficult to have a healthy relationship when narcotics are in control. i speak to this both personally and professionally, i owned and operated a pharmacy for years so i know first hand that addiction knows no boundries. have seen women dripping in diamonds step from a benz to come sit on a plastic bench next to someone who looks like they probably spent the night on the street. I have listened patiently to people explain how their meds fell down the drain and they have to get more before a trip out of town for a funeral...just like 3 other patients before them...addiction is a real thing, and can happen to anyone, especially people dealing with very real chronic pain, i truly get it. i think i have been so afraid to venture down this path that i have delayed getting any help at all.
i also delayed because i dont want to hear that i have something for which there is no cure and no solid plan to wellness. i do not want to hear him say, "you have fibromyablia". i do not want to hear that because i know that means the pain and fatigue will never really go away. in the last 8 months, the symptoms have reached a level that i can no longer tolerate, ignore or brush aside. i can no longer excercise, it takes me 3+ hours to get ready for work. i struggle to stay awake during the day, doze at my desk and am in almost constant pain. the primary care started me on 30 mg of cymbalta 3 weeks ago, aside from nausea i cant tell i am taking anything. the 4mg of tizanidine before bed makes me sleepy but doesnt help me sleep through the pain.
i have also delayed admittedly because of the stigma associated with fibro. regardless of if the stigma is valid, it does exist and is also a component of the illness/syndrone/disorder that has to be fought against. its hard enough to get my head around the realities of the physical and emotional aspects of this uphill fibro climb; i dont have the time or energy to combat the mentality of people saying that fibro is in my head, that i just need a little pill for depression, more supportive shoes, a better mattress, a new pillow, to get a make-over and new hairstyle or the host of other suggestions that have been made in the last 8 months.
i am hoping that someone here has experienced real releif from something or a combination of somethings. any suggestions and advice are appreciated.
the length of time i have been riding on the struggle bus is partially my fault, I began experiencing symptoms over 10 years ago, it has just taken me a long time to be willing to put the pieces together. i think that i am in a denial/anger phase and for a host of reasons...first and foremost my mom has fibro and 20+ years into it is now heavily addicted to narcotics. not making a judgement about her pain, treatment plan or anything other than how the addiction has impacted me and my kiddos. i honestly feel a tremendous amout of saddness for her and the path she is on. i have watched her isolate herself, refuse help, go against sound medical advice and spiral out of control.
it is very difficult to have a healthy relationship when narcotics are in control. i speak to this both personally and professionally, i owned and operated a pharmacy for years so i know first hand that addiction knows no boundries. have seen women dripping in diamonds step from a benz to come sit on a plastic bench next to someone who looks like they probably spent the night on the street. I have listened patiently to people explain how their meds fell down the drain and they have to get more before a trip out of town for a funeral...just like 3 other patients before them...addiction is a real thing, and can happen to anyone, especially people dealing with very real chronic pain, i truly get it. i think i have been so afraid to venture down this path that i have delayed getting any help at all.
i also delayed because i dont want to hear that i have something for which there is no cure and no solid plan to wellness. i do not want to hear him say, "you have fibromyablia". i do not want to hear that because i know that means the pain and fatigue will never really go away. in the last 8 months, the symptoms have reached a level that i can no longer tolerate, ignore or brush aside. i can no longer excercise, it takes me 3+ hours to get ready for work. i struggle to stay awake during the day, doze at my desk and am in almost constant pain. the primary care started me on 30 mg of cymbalta 3 weeks ago, aside from nausea i cant tell i am taking anything. the 4mg of tizanidine before bed makes me sleepy but doesnt help me sleep through the pain.
i have also delayed admittedly because of the stigma associated with fibro. regardless of if the stigma is valid, it does exist and is also a component of the illness/syndrone/disorder that has to be fought against. its hard enough to get my head around the realities of the physical and emotional aspects of this uphill fibro climb; i dont have the time or energy to combat the mentality of people saying that fibro is in my head, that i just need a little pill for depression, more supportive shoes, a better mattress, a new pillow, to get a make-over and new hairstyle or the host of other suggestions that have been made in the last 8 months.
i am hoping that someone here has experienced real releif from something or a combination of somethings. any suggestions and advice are appreciated.