It's a three way tie for me. My legs, my knees, and my right hand are the worst- most of the time. I joined this forum in late April early May of '14, and my hand pain began in early May. Sometimes it seems as though Fibro/Fatigue/Pain is a little gremlin that revels in sabotaging anything in which you find joy, peace, or relief. This is best, most polite and most supportive forum I have ever been in, and just a few days to a week after joining, my hand is in terrible pain- so much so that I couldn't type. In the last several months, I have learned to deal with the hand pain, unless it is a flare up day. I have had surgery on my left knee and need it on my right, but have no insurance right now. My legs are in a constant state of flux- in other words, they go from throbbing pain, to cramping, to stabbing pain radiating from my knees throughout my entire lower half, even into my toes, to all of the above at one time. My doctor has told me that I have one of the worst cases of fibro he has ever seen. He's a GP though; I go to him through a charity program, but there is no rheumey in the program. But I guess hearing that from a medical professional only solidifies that fact that I am not crazy or weak. It is not all in my head and it is okay to have to lay in the bed.
Like some others have said, wherever my pain is, it is the worst in the morning. Sometimes, I get out of bed, and hit the floor because my legs refuse to hold me up. I take my meds, and try to lay down and/or rest until they start to kick in.
Someone asked if the weather affects the pain, and I say a resounding YES. If there is a really serious thunderstorm coming in the next 72 hours, I will get a really serious migraine. And let me say now before I forget that a migraine like that trumps every other pain I have ever experienced. If you know migraine sufferers, you have probably heard them say it feels like there is an icepick stuck in their brain. Well, that is exactly it. There is no exaggeration. (And I have been stabbed so I know.) It literally feels like someone has stabbed me in my brain, and every time there is the slightest light or sound, it is as though someone comes along and thumps the icepick. The weather also affects the pain in my back, shoulders, knees, legs, hands, and feet.
But a few times this year, the pain has been so bad everywhere, I could not bear to have clothes on and being covered with a sheet (just a sheet, because it felt like the comforter weighed 100 lbs.) made me cry. The only relief I got was taking enough meds to go to sleep.
Some of the worst "pain" though, is the emotional pain. When people don't understand and say things that hurt and belittle you and call into question your pain, whether or not you are lazy or a just a "freeloader." When people don't understand that getting up, getting out of your pajamas and taking a shower is a MAJOR feat. Or when you look around on Friday, and there is little to no change in the house from Monday, and you are discouraged, and you belittle yourself. Someone asked if others had anxiety attacks, and I raise my virtual hand. I have had them a lot lately. Someone on another thread talked about having suicidal ideations, mainly as an escape from the physical pain. That is me almost every day- but I want to escape both types of pain. Sometimes the only two things that stop me is the fact that my best friend is the one who will find my body, and she may or may not have my two year old goddaughter with her, and my life insurance policy recently lapsed and it would leave my son with no contribution from me for his future. I am about to start going to counselling for the depression, and anxiety and for ways to cope with the pain, and I hope it helps. I really need some coping skills.
I guess it is a five way tie- my legs, my knees, my right hand, migraines, and the emotional pain.
