Old 04-23-2017, 09:39 AM #1
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Default Really tired of the vicious circle

Last night I was supposed to go to a party, and I had agreed to bring the coleslaw. I tried to pace myself all day, getting the things done I had to do but not over doing it, and made sure I had time to rest for 2 hours before time to leave for the party, but I could tell as the time approached that there was no way I was going to be able to find the energy to go to the party.

So I had to call the hostess and leave her a message saying I could not come, and then I had this huge bowl of coleslaw most of which will probably go to waste now and I am just so sick of this.

I don't have enough energy, so I don't go do something that would probably be fun, which makes me depressed, which adds to my stress, which sucks away my energy, and increases my pain an d then I don't have enough energy to do something that might be fun, and around and around and around it goes.

Just so sick and tired of this and wondering if life will ever feel as though it is worth living again.
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Old 04-23-2017, 12:17 PM #2
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Default Re: Really tired of the vicious circle

Sorry you're having such a rough time of it just now. Fibro is relentless! It seems like my day starts off feeling knackered and no energy as soon as I get up, do some tidying around the house, I then have 2 kids to get ready & out to school by 8.35am, rush down to work for 9am & am there til 2.45pm, rush home for kids getting in at 3pm, finish housework, check homework, get dinner on, get work things ready for next day, a bath to take away some of the aches & pains, fall asleep in front of tv exhausted, go to bed & Groundhog Day starts all over again when I wake up to the exact same thing. All of my energy is taken up trying to keep a house, work & with my family. I rarely have any time or energy for anything else & like you, wake up thinking what is the point of getting up to feeling like this & knowing it will never go away, if anything it may get worse. I know I can't possibly make you feel any better but you're definitely not alone in feeling like this. I'm still very much in denial most of the time & the rest of the time feeling down or fed up. I hope you have a better day tomorrow. *hugs*
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Old 04-24-2017, 04:00 PM #3
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Default Re: Really tired of the vicious circle

Hi Sunkacola,

I know how u feel.I get up everyday with things I want to do.But as the day goes on,I get worse.
I'm in a big flare right now,and it's not ending yet.
And it just puts me in the mind set of,Is it ever gonna end?

We all feel the same way some days. I know you had well intentions to go to that party, Ive done that plenty of times. But we know our limits and you just don't want to collapse and hurt yourself more.

Only we can understand how we feel inside. Hopefully the lady having the party understands your ill.I give u credit for making the coleslaw.

I love coleslaw! send it express to me!!! Lol

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Old 04-25-2017, 03:45 AM #4
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Default Re: Really tired of the vicious circle

Hi,
It feels so depressing when u cant do fun things, I really feel for you as I sometimes have that problem, what I find helpful is to rest the whole previous day just do little things that need to be done before activity which I know having 2 kids is not easy to do but wanting to do the activity some things have to go on the back burner, I also find helps me is if u go to the activity even though you don't really want to u might feel better when your with people tell the people you are with how you are feeling, hopefully they will understand and be a little more caring to how you feel that hopefully will stop you feel depressed.
Hope that helps you
xxx
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Old 04-26-2017, 08:37 PM #5
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Default Re: Really tired of the vicious circle

I can totally feel you. SO sad but just keep going.
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Old 04-27-2017, 02:59 PM #6
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Default Re: Really tired of the vicious circle

me too gentle hugs ..well done too for making the coleslaw..im so sorry you missed out on the fun after all your efforts.

This illness is like a rollercoaster we just want to get off now and again and join the real world and forget the word fibromyalgia even exists!
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Old 04-28-2017, 05:41 PM #7
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Default Re: Really tired of the vicious circle

Thanks for the supportive words, all of you.
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Old 04-28-2017, 09:10 PM #8
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Default Re: Really tired of the vicious circle

I have 3 grandkids a 4 year old boy and 2 one year olds a girl and boy and I watch them often and I feel okay when I'm with them but the babies need to be held a lot and I love holding them , but the next day my back and body hurts so bad it takes me a few days to recover . And for the lady who made the cole slaw I'm really sorry you deal with that , that's my main issue since I have friends who ask me to visit and I say yes and make plans and 80 percent of the time I have to cancel and it happens over and over again and I feel like they get tired of it I know I do . And I found out my old friend has ALS and need to go see her in Cali but am so stressed about the commitment of the flight and visit .im 55 and very active when my body lets me do this sucks
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Old 04-30-2017, 02:00 PM #9
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Default Re: Really tired of the vicious circle

Welcome Juliepierce1....i see this is your first post nice to meet you.
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Old 05-01-2017, 12:53 PM #10
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Default Re: Really tired of the vicious circle

Thank you for all these posts it's very helpful to know we are not alone , I noticed I had something wrong with me back in 2004 when my little dog sat on my lap coming home from a camping trip in Oregon and that his paws putting direct pressure on my legs was hurting like I had bruises . I didn't really think it was anything until years later 2011, I had surgery from an infection in my colon and after that my symptoms showed up and after a few drs I was told I had Fibro. And it manefested into a variety of strange symptoms and want to know if anyone has any of these, Fibro knots in my legs and arms, vertigo, dizziness, headaches, foot pain, fatigue , social anxiety?
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Old 05-29-2017, 01:55 AM #11
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Default Re: Really tired of the vicious circle

"When life gives you coleslaw, make..."? Uhh.. I have Fibromyalgia (FM) too, so I'm too confused to know what "they" say. (Either from the meds or the disease). I don't even know what it is made of, and I'm too tired to research that. I'm sure you can relate to the fatigue issue. And although I'm sure you make awesome coleslaw, I don't care for it. But, if you have excess coleslaw (a problem I've never had nor heard of), here's my great suggestions:

1. Compress it into coleslaw balls and throw it out the window. (Could be fun).
2. (Try to) feed it to a pet. (They'll eat it if you give them nothing else for a few days).
3. Sweep it under the rug, (and deal with the smell later.)
4. Put it in ice cube trays to make coleslaw popsicles. Like a TV dinner, without cooking. Yumm!
5. Mail it to a friend / enemy, (with no return address, of course).
6. Give it to a homeless person (unless that's you, in which case you'd better eat it until you bust).
7. Increase its tastiness by adding bacon to it. (As everything tastes better with bacon!)
8 Commit a reverse shoplifting, and leave it at a store. Just beware of security cameras.
9. Make coleslaw shakes for the kids. A healthy treat they will remember.
10. Put it in a wheelbarrow, grab a shovel, and fill all the potholes in the street.

So, with those excellent 10 suggestions, (you can thank me later), your burdensome coleslaw dilemma is solved, and you can now go on to tackle bigger issues.

- Yeah, most of us on this website can certainly understand this vicious circle you're in. FM and/or meds for it gives me sore muscles, muscle spasms, headaches, neck pain, depression, mental confusion, sleeplessness, high medical and drug bills, drug addiction concerns, drug efficacy, low energy - crashing, frustration, irritability, symptoms triggered by stress, economic uncertainty, anxiety, upset stomach, diarrhea, constipation (narcotics), cottonmouth (cyclobenzaprine), blood pressure problems - dizziness when standing suddenly and falling down - almost passing out, inability to work, relationship issues, sleep paralysis nightmares, religious doubts, and forgetfulness. There are some more, but I'm getting tired of thinking and typing.

So, yes, I certainly know how it feels to be sick and tired of being sick and tired! And of feeling like my life is determined by my ill health and that it seems like I'll never be well and happy to be alive. I've had FM since I was a pre-teen, and was diagnosed about 25 years ago by a rheumatologist - who I see every 3 months for many years now. Before that, I went from one dr. to another, looking for a reason for my symptoms that no test could confirm. - My wife (for the short period I was married) didn't understand how I could have a real illness and my brother-in-law, a dr., concluded I was a hypochondriac. So, for me and many of us, a correct diagnosis was the first step to reducing - managing our symptoms and trying to deal with this crap. I have had suicidal thoughts, but never attempts or anything serious, and having a son to take care of by myself, since he was just 6 months old, has given me an important distraction - a reason and way to keep moving on. So, being the best father I can be - a good role model, makes me feel good about myself and helps me a lot! I have found the following helps.
1. Eat healthy - Maximize fiber, protein, whole grains, vegetables, and drink bottled water. Avoid sugar, salt, fat and preservatives as much as possible.
2. Exercise at least 20 min a day, I like riding a bike. Helps me sleep better.
3. Ice Packs for headaches.
4. Hot showers for muscle pain.
5. Various meds from an excellent dr.
6. Pace myself (like you try to do).
7. Reduce stress.
8. A good lawyer helped me with work issues.
9. Believing in myself, even when others didn't.

Don't let FM totally ruin your life! Find a hobby that lets you escape the symptoms for a while. Try to manage your symptoms as best you can and be optimistic - it's more fun than being pessimistic. Smile, especially when you are alone.
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Old 05-29-2017, 10:00 AM #12
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Default Re: Really tired of the vicious circle

pentiuman,

your post did make me laugh.................thanks for that!!
My favorite suggestion was filling potholes in the streets, because the roads around here have a LOT of those!

Welcome to the forum. I hope you stick around.
I do try to eat healthy food. but because most of the time I don't have any appetite at all, I also indulge in things like corn chips and ice cream....not a lot of such things, and I get the natural kind without preservatives. I never, ever, eat fast food and almost never go to any kind of restaurant at all. I just eat meat and veges and rice and fruit, eggs, yogurt, that's about all. Most of the time I can only get myself to eat once a day, but I make that meal healthy 98% of the time. My diet is significantly better than that of most americans although I don't eat very much.

I think my biggest problem with getting exercise is depression, rather than physical pain. I know if I could manage to get myself moving more it might help with the depression, but that is easier said than done because in depression, one just doesn't care. I don't want to take medication for depression....I already take three medications which is at least 2 more than I want to take. Although deep down I am an optimist at heart, I don't see my life situation going any where but down from here, to be honest. I don't think that fibro really rules my life. But I think that grief and depression does.

Anyway, I am glad you have joined us and, as I said, hope you stick around. Hopefully we can be helpful to you as well.
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