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allikat

New member
Joined
Jan 1, 2017
Messages
3
Reason
DX FIBRO
Diagnosis
07/2016
Country
US
State
FL
Just have to vent, I feel like very few people in my life really hear me. I'm so tired. And I'm tired of being tired. I feel bad for trying to make plans with my mother this weekend and then feeling too exhausted to get out if bad. I feel worse that there's nothing I can say that will make her understand how fibro affects my daily life. She thinks everything is solved by ignoring the problem. That I should just get out more and I wouldn't even notice the pain (her words, not mine). That my depression/anxiety that I've had since I was a teenager will just disappear if I go to church or take whatever magical pill she's heard about on daytime tv. It's not as if i never leave the house. I work 40 hours a week at a fairly stressful job and I try to do recreational things on the weekend when I can. But I get guilt tripped when I want to stay in and rest. The pain is bad but sometimes not being listened to and understood feels worse.
 
I hear you..and every word you say....you are doing so well to keep working and doing it all...please DONT beat yourself up...no one understands what this illness is like and we've pretty much all been on the receiving end of comments and attitudes that make us feel worse.

I got blamed and anger from my own partner for not being able to go thousands of miles by car where we used to go on holiday when i never knew one day to the next if i could walk to the kitchen or sit in a chair for more than an hour at a time...others i could go out for a few hours but no way 700 miles each way and get up everyday sight seeing and going out.

It was bad enough i was grieving the old me.....and still doing as much as i could in every way for both our sakes..but anger and comments and blame as if it was my fault was so painful.

Its not the only thing either so i do empathize..the magic pill..the how lucky you havent got so much to do!!! Ugh i think ive had them all.

You are brave and strong to just keep going every day....be kind to yourself.

Take Care
 
Thank you, I appreciate the support. It's hard dealing with the attitude from my mother. I moved back home with my parents a couple of years ago due to their health issues. They're doing better but I got diagnosed with fibro this past year. My father is supportive in his own quiet way. My mother seems to expect me to be up and available for her every whim though. I guess between work and home I always feel like I'm taking care of everyone else. Can't I take the day off every now and then? lol. And I've been taking small steps back into the dating scene but I'm not sure how or when to bring the fibro issue up. I don't know how to explain to someone that's not familiar with it that I may have to back out of plans at the last minute.

Thank you for your kind words. I hope you're doing well.
 
I know how you feel. It's so frustrating when people don't understand or try & support what we're going through. Working full time plus caring for your parents would have taken its toll even if you were fit and healthy. Sometimes people unknowingly take you for granted the more you do. Is there any way of spending some time on your own or with some friends having a relaxing day away from it all? I know that's not always possible, time is precious & there never seems to be enough hours in the day.
 
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