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love it!,, Guilt free zone.
 
I love this thread, thanks moe!

I have learnt so much! All of you are brilliant. It's time for me to stop trying to prove myself and getting sick doing so.

I'm one of those people who disciplines themselves to complete what has been started. I've never read half a book, no matter how bad it is! Trouble is....I'm failing in health and everything is just so hard now.

Who set those crazy rules anyway? Answer: ME!

From today on, I shall shave half a leg, let others down by cancelling late if I want, leave the dishes until I feel like it, not bother to politely respond immediately to msgs, get someone else to worry about the weeds and won't be doing a complete spring clean when freeloaders are arriving!

Wonderful friends you all are....thank you. X
 
Don't laugh too much when your ribs are sore. Ouch! :)
K.
 
Don't laugh too much when your ribs are sore. Ouch! :)
K.


:lol: same here ouch ... oh gosh the shocks! the electric shocks! LOL my ribs!!! :mrgreen: * the sounds of neck cracking* oh my jaw!!! :confused: I can't close it.
 
Lubkos.......that is what AMA doctors say about Homeopathy. that is is "only a placebo effect" when it works.
My response: I DON'T CARE!! If I feel better, if my body is getting better, who cares even if it IS a placebo!

Now, I don't think that Homeopathy....or whatever it is that you are doing....is very likely to be a placebo.
But my attitude is this:
I don't argue with success!
If it works, who cares how it is working. Just that it works.
So, good for you, is what I say, and I wish I knew what you are doing that is working so I could try it.

As for what I have given myself a break on, it's housecleaning.
I used to have to have my whole house looking Visitor-ready all of the time. Rug vacuumed, no dirty dishes, no clutter even on the coffee table, and so on.

Now I give myself a break. Don't get me wrong - my house is never a mess. But If I am tired I leave the dishes for later. I might get something half done and get tired and leave it for the next day or even the day after that. The whole house doesn't have to look really good all of the time. It's more important for me to rest my body when it needs rest.

Diamond.......what about using a heating pad? I use one and it's great. No boiling water, no pouring, etc. Mine is made with an automatic off function so that in a certain number of minutes, no matter what, it will turn itself off, so you can't leave it too long.

It also has an auto shut off if anything goes wrong with the wiring. With both those safety features, you can't forget it and start a fire or do any damage to yourself. It didn't cost very much at all - under $20. I plug it into a surge-protector just to be super-cautions because I'm that way. I am in love with my heating pad!
 
Give myself a break? Never even thought about it. Thank you so much for reminding me of it!! I sometimes do, but then I end up feeling guilty. I tell myself you are just using your fibro to be lazy!! things we do to ourselves, eh?
 
Thanks sunkacola..i did try a heating pad once and read lots of reviews on amazon but found it didn't get hot enough to help my pain. It also said not to lay on it or against it which was no good for me as i move my hwbs where ever i need...even sit on them or behind my back in a chair or slide under parts of me in bed. I keep them all in thick fluffy covers so they are soft and snuggly too.

Maybe there are brands you can do this with and i haven't found them...but thanks for thinking of me.

I also used to have my house guest ready all the time and i hate clutter. I still try to keep it tidy and as clean as possible and that's not too hard as i live alone but like sunkacola now the dishes wait until i can do them....might be same day might be the next....lol or even day 3 sometimes.

That's my one ..'I really don't care' so long as the work tops are clean and generally tidy what do a few dirty dishes matter.

The bathroom doesn't get thorough cleaned as often..so maybe a bit dusty floor sometimes....but its not grubby either...i just might only do the sink one day...the toilet another....so its clean enough for me.

haha yes my coffee table used to be pristine tidy too....now sometimes its a muddle ...unopened post and scraps of paper with things i have to do left until a day i 'can do'!
 
I'm one of those people who disciplines themselves to complete what has been started. I've never read half a book, no matter how bad it is!

This was me, exactly for decades, as well. I wanted to improve my English, so I'd start these books - often way too complicated books for an English learning teenager, but I also had this rule in my head that I had to finish it. In fact, I had the rule that I had to read every line in that book. It was not until 3 years ago when I read on another forum and someone had posted 'don't waste your precious time with books that don't capture you within the first 20 pages. There are millions of other books to try'. Light bulb moment. My first reaction 'one is allowed to do that? that doesn't mean you are less of a person?' The mind is so strange.

And this is a simple example of all the hundreds of invisible rules I had to put on myself. So so so pointless, yet it is also quite hard to rid yourself off of them. They are so embedded in me.

Just today I noticed another decade-rule of mine = take out as much laundry out of the washing machine as you can, preferably all of it. Hello?!? I have a horrible neck, not to mention messed up shoulders, not to mention; this rule is so stupid and cruel!!!! I noticed it and had to stop. What am I doing? and why??? Why am I being so cruel to myself?

We all should be kinder to ourselves....first and foremost :)
 
I think you hit the nail on the head exactly vicky.....the mind can get hold of ideas, values and our expectations of ourselves and they get embedded in us.

When we fall short we feel it to an extreme that more relaxed personalities wouldn't even notice or feel in the first place.

I'm not saying everyone with fibro has this kind of high expectation of themselves and rather rigid way of thinking but it does seem to be a trait many of us struggle with and we see as totally normal and actually something to be proud of.

I for one am quite intolerant of people being slap dash in their attitudes and not giving something 100%...not unkind i hasten to add but i find it a bit frustrating and think why can't they take important things more seriously or do a job really thoroughly.

Now i also have to let things go because of my health but only because its enforced and I'm worn out just thinking about things...teehee maybe that's how some people are born ....in a kind of haze and happy like it!

I bet they don't get fibro!

Lets all look out for anyone with one shaved leg and we will know they are fibro warriors taking care of them selves!

Either that or its someone healthy who dropped the razor down the toilet half way through shaving in the shower! :)
 
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Dry mouth easy resolution.

Watch Food TV network channel while taking 180mg of potassium. :razz:
 
Ah, Diamond, you and I are alike that way. :)
I think that the best thing I have resolved for myself is that the whole house doesn't have to be cleaned all in one fell swoop, the way I used to do it. Like you, I maintain a certain level (which is probably higher that most people do!), but I have realized that I can do kitchen one day and bathrooms the next! (What a shock).

The truth is I rarely have guests, anyway, and always know when they are coming. People never just drop by where I live because I am too far out. So what it really means is I have relaxed my expectations of myself, and learned to be comfortable with a slight level of untidy, or a carpet that is not vacuumed every day.

In my work, I go into people's houses, and the vast majority of them are a lot worse than mine. lol.
Really, it's about relaxing with ourselves, isn't it? Not expecting perfection of ourselves all the time.

That's a hard one for most people who have fibro, I think. I am sure that untidy people get fibro as well, but everyone I know who has it, and many of us on this forum, are "type A" go-getter energetic get-it-all-done types. I sure would be interested in finding out if that is a majority of fibro people. I would bet it is.
 
I was an A type ...now I'm a Zzz type ! :)
 
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