Hi, anyone more miserable than me?

I suppose i should be proper and "say hi" since im new here. I am happy to find this site and to read many simular thoughts as mine. Maybe happy isn't the right word; im not happy that there are others that feel as i do but i am comforted. So i have had fibromyalgia about 7 years now. Been depressed all my life. Diagnosed with major depressive disorder and generalized anxiety disorder. I am 40 yrs old. But for my 20yr old son, i have all but givin up. I am a hermit; no social life. Been out of work for 5 years. No money left to pay mortgage. No insurance. I'm just so over it. I get free cymbalta (on 60mg for about 1 year now) from local clinic and counceling but no real reasurance. 7 months ago I quit smoking after 25 years because i couldn't afford it. Gained 20 pounds in 2 months. That extra weight has put me over the edge causing additional pain to carry. And to top it off, i have been getting hives for the last 2 months. I know its due to stress. They come out when i exert myself. I have tried to remove anything in my life that is toxic but how to get out of my own way?

Hello and welcome. I am new here as well and have to say you are not alone. I too live the life of a hermit, not socializing, never able to make plans since I never know if I will be sick. All I can say is forgive yourself and take care of you.

I'm sorry for you Chrispy93 I'm in my forties as well and had just finished school to start on my new career when I was struck with FMS. At this stage in our lives is like it's time to soar and live a little. But now we have to find ourselves in a new way and learn not to dwell on our pains but learn how to live with it. Getting out will be good for you (even if it hurts). Get some fresh air! Enjoy nature, friends, family, etc... even if its just for a few.

My theory is, if you are going to hurt anyways (depending on the intensity), why miss out on everyday life.

I'm still learning how to cope myself, and sometimes I wish that I could be pain free every morning upon rising, but once my feet hits the floor I know my wish was not granted. I move on and try. I hope and pray that I was some kind of help to you.