Bad Day

[SBee]

Good to have a place to moan. I am having a particularly bad day. I try hard to live as best and as optimistically with the 24 hr a day pain and stiffness.
today my brain fog was so bad I could not work out how to use the kitchen taps. So I ended up scalding my hand with very hot water. And my hands, which may have arthritis are already in severe pain. My wrists are madly sensitive I can't bear them to be touched.

I ended up in tears due to the frustration of it all and my kind supportive husband felt defeated to help me. He has already taken on a lot of the household chores as I just can't manage much.

I still move as best I can,exercise when I can, cleaned up my diet even more. But today is just a bad sad one.
have written to drs for pain relief help and referral to a rheumatologist. I fell if I can get the probable arthritis under control I could do more and work more with the fibro.
Feel like I am juggling with too much health stuff all at once.
thanks for the opportunity to be so grouchy when an know so many of you are in an even worse place.

 

[sunkacola]

SBee, You can come complain in the "mean and vent" forum whenever you want or need to. To me, it sounds as if, even when you are venting, you are still trying very hard to manage things the very best that you can, so I hope that somehow you are able to give yourself credit for that.

I know how hard it is many days just to face the day and get through it as best one can. If you have a supportive partner, you are incredibly lucky; I would give just about anything to have that. But I also realize that having that person comes with a whole set of responsibilities that you at times don't feel you can fulfill, which can make you feel even worse.

I guess all anyone can say to you is that it is clear you are truly doing your best, and more than that cannot ever be asked of anyone, no matter who they are or what their circumstances are. Hang in there, and know that you are not alone.

 

[SBee]

Thank you @sunkacola and @JayCS for the support

Sunkacola you hit the nail on the head. Despite all of us trying to do our best some days just don't want to work the way we need them to.
I always forget to give myself credit for working with the health problems ( I suspect most of us are the same) and to see someone else like yourself appreciate that and remind me means a Hell of a lot. Thank you.
My husband is a great support, he is so much wanting to step in and take all the difficulties away however he can, and yes, I do feel built for not being able to do as much as I need to let alone want. But he does understand. Just gets frustrated I am so determined!

I think I forgot that some days it's ok to not be ok.
Roll on tomorrow, am ready to start again.

 

[sunkacola]

to see someone else like yourself appreciate that and remind me means a Hell of a lot. Thank you.

You are most welcome. I am glad that it helps even if only a tiny bit.
I try to offer this to others when I can because there's no one in my life to support me or offer that reminder to me, and so when I say it to another person it reminds me to say it to myself as well.

 

[SBee]

Then I say it right back at you @sunkacola.
It's very clear that you offer a huge amount of support and advice on this forum. We often seem more able to be kind to others than to ourselves it seems.

When someone is feeling quite low and somewhat defeated, a kind and understanding word is a huge thing.

I wish we could send gentle hugs, I send a virtual one to you right now.

 

[JamieMarc]

Sending hugs, love and kind thoughts straight at you, @SBee

 

[SBee]

Thanks so much for your support and kindness @JamieMarc - I happily accept them!

had a much better couple of days. Great appt with my gp. I really feel along with the fibromyalgia symptoms that there is something more going on with my hands and wrists. So he has referred me to a rheumatologist and also for a new X-Ray..agreed to give me an anti inflammatory on trial to reduce the hand pain.

He was very much talking with me rather than at me if you know what I mean, so I feel so have a good level of medical support as well as the huge source of knowledge and support from this forum.

Glad I found here

Hope everyone is having the best day they can

 

[MissNeverWell]

He was very much talking with me rather than at me if you know what I mean

Yes, I know exactly what you mean. It makes all the difference; they are relating to you on an adult-adult level rather than parent-child or adult-child level.

 

[Auriel]

Sbee
, my thing is money (I used to be quite good at it but now I phone my bank to help) this fog does make you quite confused (sometimes I have to double check things make sure thing's are right, know what I mean?) Ps hope you're feeling better today

 

[SBee]

Hi @Auriel
Thanks am am having a better day. My brain fog ( am perimenopause too so double whammy fog wise ) seems more on the practical things. Same day I scalded my hand I turned the wrong knob down on the dinner, so left that on high and burned the vegan Bolognese sauce... The pan still hasn't fully recovered.

Also I lose words. Weirdly it's common everyday things, like window for instance. The picture of the object is in my mind but the word won't come? We try to do crosswords etc to keep the brain muscles working.

Multi tasking? Forget that now. I concentrate on one thing at a time only or my anxiety creeps in.

It's good your bank can help you out. I won't do online banking etc as so feel I am not fully in control.
It's hard having to keep checking things as maybe it makes us lose confident in ourselves. Sometimes I speak out loud ' yes, I have definitely locked that door' and that seems to stop me doing any endless checks. Little ways to try to overcome the obstacles that can lurk ready to trip is up.

 

[Auriel]

Yes Sbee before you joined the forgetting words thing has come up before (I joked to my neighbour that I'll end up having to play charades instead) Iiterally couldn't remember the word hedgehog the other day so it was porcupine instead (it is annoying but you're not on you're own there's a bunch of us right here the same) I actually forget the names of people I know sometimes (that's a little scary )

 

[JayCS]

lose words. Weirdly it's common everyday things, like window for instance. The picture of the object is in my mind but the word won't come?

couldn't remember the word hedgehog the other day so it was porcupine

Yea - increasingly totally wrong words are coming out of me at the moment, fog as a type/part of my severe exhaustibility from dentist sorta flooring me.
My wife's getting a bit used to it, but today my attempts to find the word 'mask' started way off, something like "baldness" ("Glatze" in German), second try was "ant" ("Ameise", so at least that has a sort of similar sound). In my case it could be connected to my focal seizures, where that can also happen if it's a more severe one, cos it's from cortex in my speech centre.
I could keep my mouth shut, but I think it's funny, whilst you should've seen the look of my wife ... If it's anywhere near, I end up after half a minute or so saying "that there"...

 

[Auriel]

What was your dentist doing to you @JayCS? ( also i feel comforted reading stories like this )

 

[JayCS]

What was your dentist doing to you @JayCS? ( also i feel comforted reading stories like this )

"Are you sitting comfortably? Then I'll begin..."
(No, that wasn't the dentist, that was Listen With Mother...)

He only put a temporary cap on a difficult back tooth that had been that already had root canal done.
I thought something might cause problems so we postponed 3 small fillings he'd also wanted to add on.
Didn't know I'd need a local anaesthetic this time (nothing hurt there after), and that's triggered a flare of I think MCAS.
Gaining more assertiveness, I'll be discussing it with him next time. The cap keeps falling off in the meantime, I was there again last week, and I think it got another jolt today whilst eating even tho I was trying to eat only on the other side.

 

[JamieMarc]

This sounds like great news Sbee! I'm very happy for you. It's always so gratifying to have some good days after an especially bad one.