Bad Karma, well deserved....

[Rainbow]

As some of you already know cos I've been on here a while, I was diagnosed with FMS 12+ years ago & now I'm led to believe I also have ME/CFS included in the original diagnosis as 'it's now accepted by the medical profession as quote: All the same thing',
which makes sense as I've got pretty much every manifestation of all of those, not forgetting the IBS.

In fact, I'm taking up such a large portion of the alphabet I may well out-alphabet LBGTQIA+, which imo is getting a bit silly now seeing as sexuality is not & never has been, black & white or even grey but a complex spectrum that may well end up at 'Z' & have to start over again
& whatever happened to not labelling people (?) I'd like to ask but daren't.
But hey, I've digressed
& who am I to question anything of that magnitude, or any magnitude come to that
and now I'll ask my own question, which is...

Has anyone had, or got, experience of Sinusitis & is it linked to any of the above,
or is it more likely a lingering Long Covid symptom,
or is it perhaps, karma?

Seeing as I'm the one who liked to brag that I lived all my life on Pig, Cheese & Chocolate &/or Microwave Ready Meals & Takeaways?
Which is true, or rather it was true.

Now I'm instructed by the NHS Advice List on what I have to avoid as Sinusitis-triggering foods & the migraines etc kick-back if I ignore it...

ie Processed Food including Ready Meals & Takeaways,
Dairy,
Caffeine,
Gluten,
Processed Meats including sausage & HAM (eek!!),
Refined Sugar,
Tomatoes,
Bananas
and wait for it...
Chocolate (double EEEEEKK!!)

In fact, according to the list, there's very little left I can actually eat but I can't taste anything anyway.

I'll confess, I've never been a flatterer of the Organic/ 'Healthy Eating' school of thought & I'll go so far as to say my viewpoint of all that was disparaging to say the least, seeing as there's no such thing as 'Healthy Eating' once you acknowledge that both the soil & water tables are already massively contaminated.
I just saw it as a money-making con trick & let's be honest, in reality it very often is.

Oh & this tuned-in heart-beat booming that's there all the time now & gets worse at night, when it's often so loud I have to keep on turning the TV/Radio up endlessly, so much so, that the neighbours are starting to complain
but nothing stops it, or the Sinusitis, or the rest of it, not the likes of Asprin or anything else known to man/woman cos I've tried them all,
so there's no escape.
I noted there were a few posts on this, mine included but does anyone know if it's part & parcel of FMS/ME/CFS /Sinusitis?

Anyway, life continues to gather 'challenging' speed & now without the food that comforted me.

In short, I find myself languishing in my very own taylor-made corner of hell,
& I suspect, with good reason, that Karma has targeted me BIG time & who's to say I don't deserve it - oh the irony!

 

[sunkacola]

Hi Rainbow.........
Ack, so sorry to hear that you are experiencing all of this #@%&.
Personally I don't believe in Karma as it is usually defined, and so I don't think that you are living in a life that you tailor-made for yourself. Lots of people eat junk and don't get fibromyalgia, although I don't think any one eats junk all their lives and stays genuinely healthy. But then, there's the definition of healthy and what suits the individual and all of that, and each person makes their own choices. As I see it, life's operations are not personal, nor is the universe run on a merit system, and so I don't think it's useful to blame ourselves for having fibro or other maladies.

Even if it's true that it's your own fault, maybe it's best to let that go for the sake of your own mental well being at this point and find ways of enjoying what you can.

As for sinusitis, I don't know if that would be the word or diagnosis used for me, but I have had severely dysfunctional sinuses my whole life. It's a birth defect, apparently, and I have never had any sense of smell at all, which means very limited ability to taste things of course. I can completely empathize with that aspect of your current experience, although to me it's not something I have ever felt all that bad about since I don't know what it's like to be normal and therefore have not lost anything. Food is not of huge importance to me - I eat only healthy stuff, but rely more on color and texture for the experience than taste.

If your heart is booming I strongly suggest you get that checked out, if you have not already. If your heart checks out fine then could it be anxiety attacks? I've had those, and they've come on full force physically without being prefaced by any anxious thoughts or feelings whatever. I've learned to control those using simple bio feedback with a pulse/oximeter.

Good to see you post again.
Hang in there.

 

[Auriel]

I have sinus issues, (there's been a few discussions about it by here in the past) I have ent appointment week after next (dairy does exaccerbate it) I'm vegetarian, so I use dairy as my protein (I do like chocolate too), there's vegan types but dairy ones are more accessible

 

[Rainbow]

Thank you Sunkacola,

The karma thing was mostly tongue-in-cheek but the sense of irony & suffering isn't,

I'm 'hanging in there' as best I can, having given up on The Swedish Death Clean' (yes, it's a Thing & it's very in vogue right now),
mine being the very slow-motion version but when, only a matter of only days in, I was faced with carrier bags full of Birthday/Mother's Day/Valentines Cards etc, the latter from people probably long dead now & I failed to do what I should have done ie get rid,
even at my Snail's Pace, an acute sense of failure set in & it all shuddered to a halt & has never resumed.

The head 'heart beat throbbing' has been continuous for months but gets unbearably loud at night,
I was hoping for someone to say it might be FM/Sinusitis connected,
it seems I may be hoping in vain. x

After begging for months I eventually did have a quick electrocardiogram done by a nurse at my G.P. Practice
but it was very quick, so quick am not at all convinced of it's efficacy but was told it was "Ok".

Forgive my ignorance but I have no idea what...'simple bio feedback with a pulse/oximeter' is.

 

[Rainbow]

Thanks Auriel.

I keep meaning to give the Vegan chocolate a go but it's SO expensive for even a small amount.

I don't really understand how you can use Dairy Chocolate as 'your protein' if you have Sinusitis as it's on the NHS avoid list
so will make it worse
eg if I eat it I get a 5 day migraine & NOTHING is worth going through that, not even chocolate! (sobs quietly)
but maybe you've not been diagnosed with that, yet.

Hope all goes well at your ENT appointment & it is a helpful result for you, do let me/us know x

 

[Auriel]

I don't use chocolate as a protein (I eat it cos I like it) eggs and cheese and stuff are my protein , I don't eat chocolate that much, there's no rules that say I can't eat it so it's mine , but the other dairy products annoying it too so I can't really win (and going vegan before made me feel really ill so)

 

[sunkacola]

I was hoping for someone to say it might be FM/Sinusitis connected,
it seems I may be hoping in vain. x

The thing is, it's tempting to attribute everything we experience to fibro, but not everything is caused by that, and it's always important to get any new or particularly troubling symptoms thoroughly checked out to rule out other causes that could be treated effectively.
The bio feedback thing is for anxiety attacks. If you aren't having those, it probably wouldn't help.

 

[Rainbow]

Sorry Auriel, I misread your post.
Before the Sinusitis appeared I ate Cheese every day, usually in the form of a toasted mature Cheese & Ham sandwich for lunch,
as I said, along with Chocolate, there's my 3 fave foods right there & still are, just can't eat them anymore is all.
Life can be a '.....'
oops, that's a taboo word now, so just fill in the blank with whatever you deem appropriate lol.

 

[Rainbow]

The bio feedback thing is for anxiety attacks. If you aren't having those, it probably wouldn't help.

Understood, though my high anxiety level is continuous, I just manage to mask it most of the time but it doesn't take much to unmask it.

As for seeing a doctor, here in England my G.P. practice has 20,000+ patients & since Brexit/Covid nowhere near enough doctors.
Meaning unless I could afford to go Private, which I can't, getting to see a Doctor is extremely difficult at best, getting an ambulance to respond likewise even if the call is urgent & being seen at, or gaining admission to, a hospital is even worse.
At present, wait times in A&E of 12+ hours are the norm.
Even Cancer patients are on long Waiting Lists for treatment & are dying on the Waiting Lists, as are others.
I myself am an 'Urgent Referal' for a Brain Scan & as I speak, I have been waiting over 9 months.
It's just the way it is here.

 

[Auriel]

No worries

 

[sunkacola]

Understood, though my high anxiety level is continuous, I just manage to mask it most of the time but it doesn't take much to unmask it.

As for seeing a doctor, here in England my G.P. practice has 20,000+ patients & since Brexit/Covid nowhere near enough doctors.
Meaning unless I could afford to go Private, which I can't, getting to see a Doctor is extremely difficult at best, getting an ambulance to respond likewise even if the call is urgent & being seen at, or gaining admission to, a hospital is even worse.
At present, wait times in A&E of 12+ hours are the norm.
Even Cancer patients are on long Waiting Lists for treatment & are dying on the Waiting Lists, as are others.
I myself am an 'Urgent Referal' for a Brain Scan & as I speak, I have been waiting over 9 months.
It's just the way it is here.

that's how it is here, too, for the most part. Unless, of course, you have lots of money, which makes everything different.

What things have you tried, non-medication, to reduce your anxiety? I ask because having high anxiety is definitely exacerbating your many symptoms and if you could get that more under control it is almost certain to improve things at least some. And any improvement, even a small one, is golden. Masking anxiety is not treating it or addressing it. (This is the voice of experience speaking).

 

[Rainbow]

that's how it is here, too, for the most part. Unless, of course, you have lots of money, which makes everything different.

What things have you tried, non-medication, to reduce your anxiety? I ask because having high anxiety is definitely exacerbating your many symptoms and if you could get that more under control it is almost certain to improve things at least some. And any improvement, even a small one, is golden. Masking anxiety is not treating it or addressing it. (This is the voice of experience speaking).

Voices of experience are always good to hear, so thank you.

I studied Psychology at University level as part of my B.A.Honours Degree (I have 2 Degrees, if I get another one I can claim to be a member of a female singing trio lol), am a retired qualified Counsellor, 'Cruise' (Bereavement) trained & did 5 years as a Samaritan, amongst other things.
Meaning I'm pretty au fait with all forms of anxiety, it's treatments & medications etc, so been there, got the T-Shirt so to speak
& nothing has helped, except other than Marijuana, which has helped me with Fibro pain in the past
but which I had to give up, as it can lead to amplified paranoia etc, depending on type/strength & duration of use.

I'm considering trying the CBD oil
-have you, or anyone had any beneficial experience of that I wonder?

So you understand & get the bigger picture...
my anxiety is the result of spending 5+ years, including Covid Lock downs etc, in this, my tiny one-bed flat (apartment in American speak), with a son diagnosed & suffering with serious mental health issues, including PTSD, Bi-Polar, BPD, Psychosis, severe depression with self-harm & suicidal tendencies, some of which I had to physically intervene in when they happened, Narcissism & Anorexia.
I think there was more but I lost track but am sure you get the gist.

In short, I could write my own Horror film script.
Actually that's not a bad idea, except the flashbacks are bad enough, I don't want to re-live it all again
& anyway, I don't think I have enough time left to do it, even if I wanted to.

You can only imagine what I experienced but suffice to say that for those 5+ years, I lived in continuous terror day & night, the latter being the far worse of the two, in what I can only describe as the worst of all nightmares, especially for a mother, from which I suffered permanent mental & physical damage & from which I can, & never will, recover.
As I think I've mentioned on here already, I'm awaiting (9+ moths now) a Brain Scan as an 'urgent referral' for potential confirmation of Dementia/Alzheimers,
which I'm sure my experiences as a Carer for my son have triggered.

It seems to be akin to what they used to call 'Shell Shock' back in the day, that's what it feels like anyway.

 

[Auriel]

I still have pstd from narcissistic abuse (familial and past partneships) it's not nice I'm recovering, (but the memories/images are still strong in my mind) and one smear campaign is "still" going on , yes take care of your mental health and your mental health will take care of you (I just made that up : )

 

[Rainbow]

I still have pstd from narcissistic abuse (familial and past partneships) it's not nice I'm recovering, (but the memories/images are still strong in my mind) and one smear campaign is "still" going on , yes take care of your mental health and your mental health will take care of you (I just made that up : )

Well, you may have just made it up but it's spot on! x

 

[sunkacola]

I'm considering trying the CBD oil
-have you, or anyone had any beneficial experience of that I wonder?

For me, CBD does nothing at all unless I take it alongside THC. The THC can be 1:1 or less, but CBD alone does nothing for me. Everyone's experience is different, though, so you may as well give it a try.

I suffered permanent mental & physical damage & from which I can, & never will, recover.

This may be true and the last thing I would ever want to do is discount your truth or experience. But I am deep down an optimistic believer in the power of any creature to endure horrible things and find recovery nevertheless, to whatever degree.

Full recovery to a state one would be in if it had never happened is never possible with severe trauma. But I believe because of my own experience, the experience of my clients, the experience of those with whom I have shared groups and people I have talked to, that there is always more progress, more recovery, that can be made.

If a person believes that they cannot recover they won't, but if they believe that just a little more is possible, and then a little more, progress can be made toward and even reaching a much more peaceful existence. Again, this is my own experience and for me it has taken and is taking decades, but things are better now than they were a year ago, ten years ago, twenty years ago. I think it's worthwhile to trust in the process of our own body/mind to heal, because it will move in that direction if we let it, if we trust in and believe in the possibility, and do things to the best of our ability to make way for that to happen.