Foggy? More like a bad trip…

[Yousernayme]

Hi! New here. Just needing a little validation in a world of dismissal.

I’ve had fibro for a while as well as PTSD and a herniated disc in my lower back and degenerative disc disease in my neck.

Currently, I’m having a bad flare with nerve pain that’s been severe and lasting over two weeks now. I find that when I can’t get a break from the nerve pain especially, the “fog” (what a dismissing name) gets worse. I start to feel like I’m getting dementia or losing my sanity.

My cognitive function is scary off. Yesterday I drove home and completely forgot how to turn off my headlights off, as if I hadn’t driven this car for almost three years. For five minutes, I messed with every knob and dial and could not figure out how to turn them off. I ended up looking it up on YouTube and the second I saw how, it all came rushing back like “duh”. The other day my husband held my hand and it felt so foreign. I asked him if that’s how we usually hold hands. It was.

The dissociation and derealization is trippy. For example, I’m very aware that it’s my hand playing the ukulele but I feel like I have no conscious effort. Like I’m on super auto pilot and am just along for the ride. I watched myself playing yesterday and was really amazed. Like how am I keeping up with a strum pattern? How are my legs still moving when all I feel is pain and out of my body? Today I started seeing shadows and flashing lights and just felt so heavy. Like my limbs were full of metal. I was very literally dragging and crawling. I felt flattened by the overwhelming pain sensations and fatigue.

I’ve had ALL the brain tests and I see a therapist weekly so I’m confident that my brain is just exhausted from not having a break from the pain and fibro flares and ptsd flares seem to go hand in hand.
I think I’m just needing some validation that this just sucks and that I’m not going insane. I’m really trying to reframe the Intrusive/anxious thoughts and stay in coping mode.

Thanks for listening and I hope everyone is coping the best that they can

 

[sunkacola]

I think I’m just needing some validation that this just sucks and that I’m not going insane. I’m really trying to reframe the Intrusive/anxious thoughts and stay in coping mode.

This definitely sucks. And, if you have had all of the brain tests then you know you don't have Alzheimer's, you are not getting dementia and you are not going crazy.
If you are doing your best to reframe the intrusive thoughts, then you are on the right track and you are doing the best you can do for yourself. This is super important, and is, in itself, a sign that your brain is still functioning just fine despite the oddness and trippy things that you are experiencing.

I experience things like completely forgetting a common word. Just cannot think of it. Or the name of someone I know well. I wouldn't be surprised if I forgot how to turn off the lights in my car.

These things feel like madness but they are not. And, I have found that many people experience things like this sometimes or even often, and don't even have fibromyalgia let alone dementia or some mental condition.
I never experienced this previously, so at first it freaked me out. But once I got over the shame I felt at first, and started telling people about it I discovered that it's not even all that uncommon. I have had many people, even very young people, tell me they have the same thing happen sometimes, and that helped me a lot. These days I just laugh at it or, if it's not something I can laugh at that day I at least don't take it seriously. I figure that unless something happens as a result of it that is actually dangerous in some way, I don't need to be too concerned about it.

I hope this helps a little bit.

 

[Yousernayme]

This is super important, and is, in itself, a sign that your brain is still functioning just fine despite the oddness and trippy things that you are experiencing.

I want to sincerely thank you stranger. I needed this reminder. I always forget this logic when I’m deep in it. My brain knew enough to YouTube how to turn off the headlights. My brain knows enough to write lists and set multiple alarms and reminders. My brain knows to let my husband know when I’m confused. Insane people or people with brain issues wouldn’t have that type of functioning. It’s kind of like fighting to drive thru literal fog and you squint out the window or move your body to navigate thru it. Thank you for the reminder and validation.

 

[johnsalmon]

you don't mention your age

 

[Phoenix boy]

Sorry to hear that you are suffering.
I too, suffer from "brain fog", a lot. Especially during the evenings when I can feel totally wiped out.
I also suffer from Ankylosing Spondylitis which I attributed most to my brain fog, I'm fairly new to fibro & learning as I go along.
I work nights, too, which doesn't help with my brain fog & the ability to function. Although I find my job rewarding, so it's the main reason I keep on with it.

 

[nikkozoo]

I experience this a lot, even on "okay" days. I once forgot how to back my car out of a space. I feel as though I am not actually, physically there when I am. Forgetting words, substituting the wrong word happens frequently. My daughter who has had numerous courses in psychology tells me it is disassociation. I have had fibromyalgia for 20+ years. I was very alarmed when it first began occurring, would immediately leave a store, fearful as to what was happening. I have also been checked and am perfectly healthy brainwise. I now simply tell myself to wait it out, I know the cause, it will pass. It's a little easier to handle once you eliminate the fear and having been tested, you have done that. My children and I have learned to laugh about it and we do that often, it helps. I hope you feel better.

 

[JayCS]

My daughter who has had numerous courses in psychology tells me it is disassociation.

Dissociation you mean I think - some (mainly on reddit) say it is connected to brain fog, but that surprises me. Cos dissociation is to me a sensation of "clear, unfogged" complete detachment from reality (I used to get this regularly), in my kind of brain fog, i'm not detached from reality, I just can't focus on it. What do others think?

 

[sunkacola]

Dissociation you mean I think - some (mainly on reddit) say it is connected to brain fog, but that surprises me. Cos dissociation is to me a sensation of "clear, unfogged" complete detachment from reality (I used to get this regularly), in my kind of brain fog, i'm not detached from reality, I just can't focus on it. What do others think?

What @nikkozoo describes is not what would be classified as dissociation according to professionals, or the guidelines that they use to describe or diagnose dissociative states or disorders.

Feeling foggy, feeling as if you are not fully present, and forgetting words are much milder experiences than what is truly called dissociation.

Dissociation doesn't necessarily mean total detachment from reality either, though. A person who has a dissociative disorder may be fully aware of reality, but experiencing it from such a different perspective that it is not remembered by the part of the mind that is usually experiencing reality. Such is the case with dissociative identity disorders, previously called multiple personality disorder. Those disorders exist on a spectrum like many others, but are distinctly different from simply having a foggy brain at times.

Complete detachment from reality would mean that the person was having a schizoid event or a psychotic break: fully experiencing (seeing, hearing, etc.) things that are not there in reality, and not experiencing what is actually there. This doesn't necessarily mean the person is ready for a straight jacket, although at times the person may need to be contained or sedated for their own protection or to protect others. People can experience this without it meaning that from then on they are mentally ill, although it can be highly disruptive to a person's life at the time.

 

[ashlynn26]

Hi, I'm new here as well. Been dealing with fibromyalgia for years. But my cognitive function is terrible. I lost my job 3 months ago because I couldn't remember simple things, things I've been doing for years. I worked in a small medical practice, so I had certain things I had to do to keep things running. My head doesn't feel right anymore. I wish I could describe all of the sensations I feel in my head but also how it effects the functioning of my brain.
I feel so stupid, and some people have made me feel even worse for the things I can't do or remember. I would lay in bed at night looking up if I was losing my mind, am I having a psychotic break because I felt like I was going insane. It's so frustrating. I also will say things and words I don't mean, then get agitated cause I said the wrong thing and now everyone is looking at me. My family gets it but it doesn't make it any easier. It sucks that this is our lives but for the first time in this I don't feel alone.

 

[sunkacola]

You are not alone.
You are also not going crazy, having a psychotic break, or losing your mind. You can learn to adapt to this and teach yourself various tricks to get by. And, you can just be open and upfront with people and tell them what is going on. I find that if I don't take it seriously then others don't either and we can have a little laugh about it, they tell me the word I am seeking or whatever, and we move on. If you don't make a big deal of it others won't either. And anyone who is mean about it....don't spend time with that person at all.

I find a good sense of humor and being willing to laugh at myself and make light of it is my best way to deal with it. Often the other person will say "Oh, that happens to me too!" and we both laugh and it's over.
If it's someone who knows me, they know why. If it's someone who doesn't know me I am not going to tell them about fibro; they can think whatever they like but it's hard for them to be mean about it if I am already laughing at myself.

 

[johnsalmon]

I feel so stupid, and some people have made me feel even worse for the things I can't do or remember. I

you can exercise your brain the same as you muscles sites such as NeuroNation and Lumosity can present brain exercise plans for your particular problem it takes time but it is worth it

 

[ashlynn26]

you can exercise your brain the same as you muscles sites such as NeuroNation and Lumosity can present brain exercise plans for your particular problem it takes time but it is worth it

Thank you for that info...I will definitely look into it!

 

[Bunni 58]

Thank you so much for explaining dissociation because I didn’t know it was multiple personality disorders & you saved me from doing more research.

 

[Bunni 58]

In 2017 I was walking to my bed & my bad left leg gave out & I fell. I was able to pull myself up to the phone & call for help. The ambulance took me to the hospital where they did all kinds of tests. While at the hospital doctors came in to tell me what they thought was wrong with me. As soon as I mentioned Fibromyalgia they left. Therefore, I did not know anything about what tests they had taken. After my personal doctor (who also had Fibromyalgia) received the test results she told me I had a damaged brain & had cognitive dysfunction. She further told me that I had, had several Mini Strokes plus a couple more that were worse than the mini ones. Later I ended up with Fibro/Brain Fog. My fog can be mild or so terrible I can’t seem to see. It reminds me of driving in the country & not being able to see the white line in the middle of the road, just praying you make it home. Along with the fog I’m forgetting words, how to spell, people names, math, etc.
I personally don’t feel it’s the fog but that I am old & forgetting things are natural.