- May 13, 2013
This is my first time on this or any other support forum. I am admittantly a little nervous. Well, here goes nothing: I have spent most of my life with no insurance. I knew that I had pain, but I didn't know what it was or why. I haven't had the easiest life, so I figured that the pain i felt was a wonderful side effect of that. Then I got Kaiser insurance. They diagnosed my pain as fibromyalgia and we set about finding a treatment plan that worked for me. Five years went by, and my pain was annoying, and it wasn't always easy, but I had a great doctor that really cared about me and my quality of life. I didn't have any idea how good I had it. My insurance was through my husband who worked for Kaiser. In 2012 I found out that my wonderful husband was actually a p.o.s. cheating liar who was fathering children with other women. Of course I kicked him out and filed for divorce. Of all of the things that I was thinking about and dealing with while my whole life was changing around me, I hadn't even considered how terrible the loss of my insurance would be. My doctor was helpful and optimistic, and he gave me two months worth of rx's so that I would have what I needed while I found a new dr. I had these rx's filled, and I discovered that my copays through my work insurance was the same as they were through Kaiser. It totally lulled me into a sense of false security. I thought everything would turn out to be okay after all. Wrong. I have spent weeks trying to find a dr/ who believes that I am really in pain and who doesn't think that my meager 30 percocet a month is not an outrageous request. I am so terrified of not having the pain medication that I need when the pain comes - and it always comes - I would actually say it borders on panic. I don't want to have to live in pain all day every day, and I thought that in this day and age of medical capabilities no one would have to go through something like this when there is treatment available. I have insurance, I have a medical record showing years of treatment and a complete history of my medical issues. I can't believe that I can't find a dr. who is willing to treat me. To make matters worse, I work in a pharmacy. I take in rx's and sell rx's every day to people - a scary large amount of who don't need the meds. I have patinets who admit to getting their rx to get loaded. I have even had patients offer to sell me their rx that they just purchased to me in the parking lot, not realizing that I am the same person who just waited on them in the store. I am so frustrated I don't even have the words. I thought that if there was a complete medical history including prolonged use of a list of medications that are working for me at least to a decent amount that I would have very little trouble finding a pcp who would be willing to take up my care and work with me. At this point, I have been told that I am not really in pain, I have been told that I should try taking a walk when the pain becomes too much, I have been told that I should pray for relief, I have even been told that the only thing wrong with me is a mental health issue. I am an articulate, educated person who happens to work in the medical field, and yet I can't get a single dr. to take me seriously. This is rediculous!